This week on "A Thinkpiece Isn't Right For Everyone," Washington Examiner Executive Editor Phillip Klein threw together some words and formed the article, "Elizabeth Warren's plan to cancel student loan debt would be a slap in the face to those who struggled to pay off their loans."
What Phillip doesn't understand is that most people who have at least an ounce of empathy want to leave the world better than they found it. People fought for the freedom they would never get to experience. People fought for rights they never reaped the benefits of. People always have and continue to fight for improvements in laws, technology, and mindsets that will make the world a better place, many knowing that those improvements will never be a part of their life.
So would the cancelation of student loan debt be a slap in the face for those who struggled to pay off their loans? Well, if your answer is yes, then see below for all the other faces you're slapping.
1. Cars would be a slap in the face to people who had to ride horses to their destination
Do you enjoy getting into your nice warm car to drive to work every morning? Well, think about all the people before you who had to saddle up their horse and brave the weather on horseback to get to their job forging weapons every time you complain that your heated seat isn't warm enough.
2. Women being allowed the right to vote would be a slap in the face to the women who weren't allowed
Ah, the suffragette movement, except instead of fighting for women's right to vote, they fought for their right to not be allowed to vote because it wouldn't be fair to them.
3. Picking up some butter from the store would be a slap in the face to those who churned their own
"I can't believe its not butter"? Well, I can't believe people just sit back and allow themselves to buy pre-produced sticks of butter without even thinking of the times when you had to engage in manual labor to butter your pastry.
4. Black people living as free members of society would be a slap in the face to those who were slaves
Abraham Lincoln, but instead of the Emancipation Proclamation, it was the "I'm An Asshole Who Doesn't Understand What Progress Means" Proclamation.
5. Going to the liquor store to buy some drinks for a party would be a slap in the face to everyone who had to open a speakeasy to serve alcohol
Don't you miss the days when you had to pay off police officers and hide your alcohol in anticipation for raids from federal agents?
6. Child-labor laws being passed would be a slap in the face to the children who used to work 18-hour factory days for a nickel
Wasn't it so fun being 8 and not having to rise at the crack of down to go work in a low-paying, unkempt factory for not enough money to buy yourself a meal? I can see those kids making tweets about how it is so unfair that children nowadays don't even get exploited for cheap labor.
7. Copy machines would be a slap in the face to the scribes who used to rewrite entire books so two people could read it at once
When you make a copy of a 10-page document at work, do you even think about the people who used to have the job title "scribe" who could earn their coin by rewriting documents? With their hands?
8. Popular, well-made television shows and moves would be a slap in the face to those whose primary form of entertainment was a court jester
We should have just not improved the film or entertainment industry out of respect for those who literally used to be entertained by someone who's job description was "fool."
9. Same-sex couples who get the chance to marry the love of their life would be a slap in the face to those who did not have the right
Cancel the pride parade this year. How can we stand around and let gay men and women get married when they used to *gasp* not be allowed? This is progress that we as a society simply will not stand for.
10. Vaccinations would be a slap in the face to the thousands of people who died of Polio
This is a bad example.
11. The invention of Twitter for people to share their thoughts would be a slap in the face to the people who used to have to keep their stupid hot takes on politics to themselves
Isn't it really just a big old slap in the face to all the dumbasses before this guy who couldn't write and share with a mass audience their ridiculous, poorly-thought out ideals?
