What can a Muslim American see in this election's outcome? And how do we anticipate reacting?

Back in 2011, the Comedy Central's annual Roast centered on Donald Trump. Here is a link to Trump's roast highlights that I highly recommend watching (I would warn you to prepare yourself to be offended, but this election was probably enough of a primer).

So our president-elect is someone who has been roasted. People who get roasted are supposed to be "has-beens" — humans who can stand to be degraded and have their dignity in the dumps. It's not a bad thing to be able to bounce back from a roast; it shows gumption. But it's strange that someone who has been through such an experience can climb to one of the most powerful leadership positions in our nation. You could argue that it shows something powerful on Trump's part to rise out of a roast and become president (like being a rich white male), but I did not hear the roast come up even once during this election. Think about the implications of this for a moment.

So that's not the bad part. The bad part is that you let this human get the best of you. You heard the terrible things he did and said and you let it slide; you let him become the president-elect.

I'm not really talking about the people who voted for him here, I'm talking about the people who legitimized him to the point where anti-Clinton Americans felt they had no other way to turn. I'm looking at those of you who made it so that some Americans had to hold their nose as they casted their vote for him— but still, they didn't look past that decision (if that even matters).

If he was sharp enough to know what areas to strike in potential voters, perhaps, he was sharp enough to know what his rhetoric would bring about. Again, I want to dislike him for the pain his words have caused, but I'm looking at the people who actually went out and caused the catastrophes we're seeing.

The following is something beyond religious mumbo jumbo — it is a perspective from my faith that plays into the real world.

Hear me out when I tell you that I see Trump as a devil-like figure... Which, surprisingly, is why I don't hate him. (I know, this sounds bizarre and mystical already, but it very much centers on the real world).

See, as a Muslim, I believe that people are held responsible for their own actions, in spite of outside influences. Our idea [as Muslims] is that something in us may tap into our weaknesses (call it the devil, call it a lack of discipline — either way, acknowledge it), but it is up to us whether we accept such invitations or not. Trump did not directly invite; what he did was incite. But I really thought our nation could be better. I really thought that this is what made America great.

This is not about actual angels or devils, this is about you. The devil does not scare me, but the weaknesses of mankind does.

It did hurt that he had the audacity to publicly and privately do and say many disgusting things, but knew that he could. Now, we know, too because he's our president-elect.

That's why it hurt the people who have suffered from sexual abuse and discrimination — you reminded these people that they aren't safe.

He said what he said, but we, as Americans, did not have to do what we did. I'm talking about the deliberate degradation of our values; about what truly makes America great, and placing this roasted celebrity on the pedestal of presidency. He didn't force you — you did this.

What a disappointment I felt. The red line did not have to cross the 270 mark before it went through my heart.

I lost some faith for a moment because it hurt more than I thought it would when it became real; maybebecause it became real.

I wanted to emulate the actions of our beloved Prophet and be good to even those who wanted the worst for us. After all, I know that many votes that went to Trump did not necessarily come from a place of hatred for Muslims and other minorities, just a disregard.

People had other concerns that needed to be addressed, and somehow, selecting the likes of Trump was the solution to that.

I am still figuring out how to emulate the best qualities a Muslim can have though. I tried following a general doctrine of, "If you don't have anything nice to say then don't say it," and this proved to be refreshingly isolating. It led me to congregate with those who did not vote for Trump, fellow minorities and white friends. It polarized me from those who did vote for Trump, minorities or not. Obviously, things cannot carry on this way.

I do see the irony here: my reaction is polarizing, even though Trump's campaign relied on such a strategy. I felt that my demographic was ignored, but so many of who voted for Trump felt that their needs were ignored. I'm not blind to this reflection, I just don't know what to do about it.

I wanted Trump voters to see what happens when someone chooses to be divisive, and to have that legitimized. Is that wrong of me? If I am an American who cares about her nation as much as she claimed before, then maybe it's not the best option for me to keep this up. But I don't think it's unjustified for me to ask for some time to digest this.

If you can't understand that it's rather awkward to go about your day in a country that legitimized and elected a man into power who's platform involved degrading your existence, then I'm not sure what to tell you.

I used to find comfort and noticeable growth from being a better human through the desire to be a better Muslim, but it is so difficult for me to be a decent Muslim and smile at those who did not care about my demographic, because I — wait, does that really call for an explanation?

I guess the worst of this election brought out the worst of me, too.

This election challenged my faith in ways that I think nobody could have predicted.

When I saw the results, I reminded myself that they stung because of the way my faith sets me apart — it makes me a minority in my beloved nation, so I should take the chance to go back to the roots of this faith and use them to build myself stronger. I was supposed to tap into virtues of kindness, moral strength and a love for all of God's creatures. I thought it would be easy because this strategy was effective in the past, but I could not make it mold to my current situation, which was new.

I still love my fellow Americans at heart, Trump voters or not. I'm just afraid to let it show because I feel like I will be unjust to myself and many others if I do.

I know that to stand up and move on is a sign of strength, even if people mistake it for weakness, defeat or surrender.

So I guess I'm just sorry.

I'm sorry that the presence of people who look like me made you so uncomfortable that you let it slide. I'm sorry that the existence of immigrants and minorities upon whose backs this country was built on were so bothersome that you let their lives matter less.

And I am really, truly sorry about one thing — that you had to suffer. Some of you were in pain; I know because I'm in pain now, and my generation suffered some of the anxieties of this recession, too.

Are we not mutually wigging out over the prospect of devoting disproportionate amounts of our mental and physical capacity to our college career in spite of knowing that we might not even be employed afterwards? College or not, do we all not want the opportunity to lead a decent life?

You just wanted a job and to have a livelihood that you could be proud of. No one could ever blame you for this, but you blamed others. You scapegoated, you let hate get the best of you, and you let him [you know who!] take advantage of you. And he did.

It isn't some healthy catharsis that people are expressing their repressed sentiments, even if it's apparently worth others getting hurt. It's a plague. It's a disease that was dormant, and you let it show up and spread. I was so sure that I was immune to the pain, but to my surprise, I saw its symptoms showing up on my skin the night of the election.

It's not even just about being a Muslim, but a female.

I know some of you felt compelled to vote for Trump because you just could not vote for Hillary. I know that you could speak against the accusation that you didn't vote for her because she's a woman, but let us take a few turns before we hit this conclusion:

The idea wasn't that "She is a woman, therefore I cannot vote for her." The idea was that "she did this and she did that" even though men throughout history who earn countless praises have done such horrid things that we consistently overlook, and when a woman falls under suspicion, it is the blackest of marks.

You overlooked the most heinous and deliberate moves on Trumps part, but you had the audacity to call Hillary "evil" next to him?!I can't deny that she's no angel either, I really can't. But you let a man get away with things that a woman never could, and I will remind you again you let him become the president of this hegemony.

Far be it from me to lay a blanket of misogyny over all voters who did not select Clinton. I can't deny that I would have been weary of some foreign policy moves on her part, but that's because I have this shortcoming where I see the lives of people in the Middle East as actually worth something, so I would be skeptical of Trump's plans, too. Let's see what happens.

I'm am falling to the level of the people I feared, and its almost like I can't help myself. I don't know what other direction to turn in because I just don't know what the right move is from here on. I recite Al-Fatihah, a chapter that concerns guidance on the right path, because I can't stand the idea that I revel in my anger to make myself feel better (because it kind of did make me feel better). But I can't carry on this way. I can't become the people who hurt me. If I do, then the devil really wins.