This has been a really hard week for me.

I am a white, upper(ish)-middle class woman at university who passes as straight, identifies as female and lives in California. We're all more complex than the spaces we occupy, but these are the lenses which I watched the election through.

I actually don't want to discuss the politics of this election at all. I'm not well-informed enough, and it's not what's affecting me the most. And I sure as hell don't want to entertain the idea that elections are rigged. If we undermine our democracy, then what good is our nation?

Because here's the thing about our democracy: we have freedom of speech. And I am not going to be silent any longer.

Here are some of the things I've learned from this election.

1. I shouldn't have been shocked.

Had I really been paying attention to the underlying currents of prejudice in this country, I wouldn't have been so surprised. Yes, Hillary clinched the popular vote, but not at all by a landslide. There are many reasons people voted for Trump, just as there are many reasons he built his campaign on the things he said, even if he doesn't believe it himself.

But that doesn't matter.

What he said matters because there are real people who believe his hateful spewings. In every corner of America, there is a corrosion of trust. Privileged people discredit the cries of the marginalized by saying they're being "too PC" or they should "get over it." The minorities who are told that now can no longer trust who to turn to because their neighbor may have supported a man whose platform was based off of deporting their parents and converting their friends.

The worst thing that would have happened if Hillary won would be that white people would feel their voices weren't being represented, while the worst thing that has happened since election day is people are killing themselves.

Every minority in this country fears for their lives and their loved ones'. I am afraid.

My generation has grown up brainwashed, thinking that racism and sexism isn't prevalent. We forget that just three generations ago we had Japanese internment camps. We seem to forget that today, over half the American population is deemed lesser because women earn less than men doing the same job.

These are systemic problems. They have been with us all along. It's not a surprise that Trump won when he preyed upon our nation's inherent biases.

2. I'm still angry.

Anger is an incredibly useful emotion. Whatever emotion you're feeling is completely valid. Telling someone they are "overreacting" means that you do not understand what they are going through. I feel 1/8th the anger that my black, Latinx, LGBTQ, Muslim, etc. friends feel when they have lived in this world every day.

I feel this anger every time I experience inequality as a woman. Every time a man grabs my ass. Every time some guy says, "Not all men." Every time I see a man get time off a rape sentence. My blood boils every. Single. Time.

But I'm going to use that anger. I'm going to hold myself and everyone I know accountable for the things we say and the actions we take. If you want to engage in a dialogue with me about anything I've written in this article, please reach out to me. Or just wait until I catch you saying, "Stop worrying. He won't really do anything," and you better believe I am going to explain to you how dangerous that statement is.

3. I hadn't listened to Trump supporters (but they're not listening to Hillary voters).

Several people I know voted for Trump not because they agreed with what he said, but because they are fed up with candidates not living up to what they've promised and help their livelihoods. They don't feel represented. Or they hate Hillary. Or they just don't like her policies. Or maybe they hated both and voted third party.

But here's the problem with that: if you voted for Donald Trump or you voted third party or you wrote in nonsense, you allowed a man whose platform is based on hate into the office. I say "Hillary voters" because in this election, there was one fundamental reason to vote for Hillary, even if you didn't like her policies. The reason is not that we're anti-Trump (though believe me, I am). It's that we are pro-LGBTQ, pro-immigration, pro-women, etc. And Trump's platform isn't.

I'm not saying you're a horrible person if you voted for him. I'm not saying you can't disagree with me. I'm asking you to recognize what Trump as president means to these marginalized people. If you want to say you stand with these communities, just know your action to vote for Trump is a vote to undermine their humanity, whether you wanted to do that or not.

4. I am an insufferable optimist.

Aside from listening to "Hamilton" on a constant loop, these past few nights I have attended meetings with the student unions on my campus for marginalized communities. I was in a room full of more diversity than I've seen in one space on my campus. I only recognized 10% of the faces there. And I have never felt more safe in my life.

The overall sentiment was that people are feeling sad, angry, scared, but also hopeful. This is kicking our asses into gear. The executive board members of these organizations said they have never seen this student-body turnout before, especially from white students. I know I'm joining pretty late in the game, but funny enough, the minorities are not turning anyone away.

We all believe that the future is going to be directly affected by what we do today. Maybe that is part of being a college-aged millennial. And I'm sure as hell glad I am. We are going to reject actions of hate, while we meet one another with love. We are going to practice self-love, and while I won't be able to protest 100 percent of the time, you can bet I am going to do something with my art.

That's why I'm writing this now. And why I'm not going to stop.

Thanks for reading.