(Ah, the presidential election, modern day equivalent of the sit-com.

Oh, I'm not supposed to say that. Elections should be respected right?

Right....

Seriously, that has never been less true than this year.

So, since we can't move out of the country and no one else is stepping up, we have only 2 options.

Maturely weigh the situation and choose the greater of two less than optimal choices....

or just sag into a pile of cynical anarchy and bludgeon everything to death with sarcasm.

I think you know which one I(we) choose.

Happy early 2016 election.....and a merry caricature to all!!)

Announcer: "Welcome everyone, to the 2016 Presidential Forum! I am delighted and honored to present our two esteemed candidates, HC and DT (initials to preserve the possibility of false identification in case of trouble :) ). Everyone please give them a round of applause."

[There is brief and polite applause. The candidates briskly shake hands then advance to their respective podiums.]

Announcer: "Now we all know how this works. I will ask each candidate a question, they will be given a minute (or unlimited time depending on my leaning and their grandstanding) to respond, then the other candidate will do the same. Afterwards, the candidates will be allowed to attack each other's moral fiber. Let us begin. HC, foreign policy is a big issue in today's political climate. How do you plan to deal with issues such as political tension in the Middle East, immigration and refugees, the place of the US in the international community?"

HC: "That is an excellent question announcer. First let me just say that my opponent has no idea how to resolve these issues."

(simultaneously) DT: "That response is complete fiction! And ridiculous! And idiotic!"

(simultaneously) Announcer: "Please stick to your own merits for this discussion."

(smiling somewhere right of the camera) HC: "Let me stress my own merits for this upcoming election. I was secretary of state, an EXTREMELY important cabinet position..."

DT: "That caused all the problems that we have today!"

HC: "And I made momentous achievements..."

DT: "You've been failing at this your whole life!"

HC: "In the name of achievement and progress. And I was also instrumental for almost all the achievements of our current President. *pause.* But let us remember most of all that I am more qualified and far superior to my opponent for all of the above-mentioned issues."

DT: "That's complete ####!"

Announcer: "I want to hear more about this."

Network Guy: "WHAT ARE YOU DOING. MOVE ON."

Announcer: "Now to you DT. Same question."

DT: "First of all, I would like to countermand (bangs fist on table) everything my opponent just said."

HC: "I think the facts speak for themselves...."

DT: "My opponent's 'plans' have plunged the country into a worse state than any since WWII and Vietnam."

HC: "That's just false..."

DT: "And look at all these other OBVIOUS facts that she is ignoring (bangs fist on table)."

HC: "Name one."

DT: "There was that trade agreement. There was that Middle Eastern State of Islam something. There was that..."

HC: "All of those were successes."

DT: "All of those were failures!"

Announcer: "I'm going to flip a coin on this one. (flips. Stares at it.) Let's just forget I did that."

DT: (stands up) "Okay here's the deal. My opponent sucks and she was part of the people who made this country suck and I was not so I will come here and fix everything. IT'S SO OBVIOUS, PEOPLE VOTE FOR ME!!!!"

HC: "You are an unqualified loudmouth."

DT: "YOU....LIE.....alot."

HC: "I won't respond to that."

Announcer: "Let's just move on to economics. HC and DT, what are your plans to fix the recession that was technically fixed somewhere 2012 but has not yet fully recovered so we're really arguing over leftovers here."

DT: "I will cut taxes and fix loopholes." (Said every politician in the history of ever....)

HC: "I will....not. I will spend money. *quietly* and raise taxes."

[Please note here, for the uninformed viewers that study's have shown that Trump's plan will raise the deficit more than Hilary's. However, it might also encourage more growth, but that wasn't included in the study. Basically we have no idea which is better. That's up to you. Do your own damn research!]

DT: "I will make businesses return to this country." (This is actually somewhat of a problem. Everywhere else has less manufacturing costs)

HC: "You are just doing....REAGANOMICS over again!"

DT: "Oh yeah? Well you're a lying oil slick!"

HC: "Oh am I? You're a racist bigot!"

DT: "Pawn of the establishment!"

HC: "Wild card!"

DT: "DEMOCRAT!"

HC: "REPUBLICAN!"

Announcer: "Please keep going cause otherwise this debate is boring as hell."

Announcer: "Now on to the vice-Presidential debate."

[The audience laughs long and loud.]

Announcer: "That's right, no one cares about that!"

Narrator: "As the reign of the current President drew to a close, dissatisfaction was at an all time high. With HC not being a trustworthy successor and DT not being a reassuring alternative, everyone everywhere panicked."

The end.

*Disclaimer

The above representations are not real. Well enough legalese. I hope you guys had fun! See you next week!