As I sat down to watch the election results on Tuesday night, I expected the same thing that many other Americans did: to watch as the United States elected its first female president. Sure, Hillary Clinton was far from perfect. She had baggage. But she had adopted positions that millions of Americans, especially the young, strongly believed in. And she was a new chapter of history in the making. Yet it wasn’t enough. I held out hope even as the early results appeared to lean in Trump’s favor. He pulled in North Carolina. He pulled in Florida. He pulled in Ohio and Iowa. Though I found myself increasingly nervous, I wasn’t surprised: these were states I had always expected him to carry. But then the unthinkable happened, and the “blue wall” crumbled. Pennsylvania went red; Wisconsin went red; Michigan went red; all for the first time in decades, states that everyone was so sure Democrats had in the bag. Everyone was wrong. And just like that, it was over. Despite her razor-thin lead in the popular vote, Clinton’s path to 270 electoral votes – the votes that really matter – was closed, and Donald’s was wide open. Sure enough, just hours later, he was declared the winner of the election.

Donald Trump will be the 45^th President of the United States. No matter how many times I look at that sentence, the words put together in that combination, it still feels like I’m living in some sort surreal of Twilight Zone. But for another half of the country, there is a celebration and a feeling of jubilation. Half of the country had hoped that unity would win over divisiveness, while the other half viewed it as a rebel freedom fighter taking on a corporatist establishment. Both interpretations of this election were justified. But it's important to know that while surely there were many among his supporters who did, most of them didn’t vote for Trump because of his bigotry: they voted for him in spite of it. This was an immensely divisive election, there’s no question about it. But we should understand that Trump is not the only one to blame. Clinton holds her fair share of the blame as well. Without a doubt, a Pandora’s box was opened by Trump’s rhetoric, and it’s no surprise that incidents of hate seem to have suddenly spiked in the wake of the results, or at least have become more visible. And it's also no surprise that large and passionate protests have continued for days since the election results, as Clinton spent much of her campaign stoking fear and demeaning her opponent's character rather than focusing on the issues. Right now we live in a polarized, divided nation. We are essentially two countries living within a single border, or at least that's how it feels. I can only hope these wounds heal in time. As Clinton said in her concession speech, Donald Trump is going to be our next President, and at the very least we on the left must try to give him "an open mind and the chance to lead."

The morning after, I felt defeated. Saddened. Frightened, genuinely so. I considered whether I, as an LGBT person, still had a place in a country that elected a homophobic Vice-President and an entirely Republican government. But that only lasted for a couple days. Watching the protests on television, and seeing the popular vote go Clinton's way, my hope is renewed. I have no idea what's to come over the next four years; it could be great, or it could be all wrong. But I do know that in the long term I am confident that America's future is bright, that progress will continue to be made on all fronts toward a more inclusive and just country. But it won't happened without us. We need to play our role. We mustn't wallow in despair, but rather see this as motivation to fight on. We're the underdogs now, but we still have the wind at our backs. Get involved in politics if you can, or volunteer for local groups that aim to help people. The future of this country and the world at large is what we choose to make of it, just as it always has been; this truth has not changed. And in just two years when midterm elections roll around, to quote from President Obama, make sure that you don't just boo: vote!