Eating Disorder.

That’s a scary word for me. I hear it and see the faces of dear friends who are struggling to get through each day. I hear the voices of friends who have passed as well as the voices of the living. They cry for help silently through the choices they make with their meals.

Some of these beautiful people struggle to eat at all. They suffer from anorexia nervosa. This is a disorder characterized by purposefully subjecting oneself to malnutrition as a way of losing weight. Simply, choosing to eat sparingly if at all. Simultaneously they often are constantly exercising, which enhances the effects of malnutrition.

Other beautiful people I know struggle with bulimia. This is intentionally vomiting after eating in an effort to lose weight. Sometimes a person will binge before purging. Other times they will eat normally. Either way, the purge happens. Some also have a fixation with fitness, but not all.

Both disorders are extremely dangerous to the body. Hair and teeth begin falling out, nails yellow and skin pales. It is not a pretty picture to be staring at a skeleton. On top of this, vital organs shut down which can and will lead to death if not helped. However, these ways of living quickly become habits and addictions. They are difficult to stop, and in the process of giving up this lifestyle a person can go through serious withdrawal and may need serious help to push through. Honestly though, while it is dangerous and terrifying, the disorder is not the deepest problem.

I know you’ll want to stop me when I say that and tell me I’m crazy, but it is true. Disorders are not the root issue. There is more to the story than the behavior seen on the surface. There’s emotions and experiences that have led up to and caused the monster within. When a person comes to terms with and understands the emotions and experiences for what they are, then it becomes easier to start the process of recovery. However, this often requires professional help and that can be very terrifying. Until that professional help is found, the best thing to do is encourage wellness and act with gentle understanding. Freaking out is never the answer. Compassion always triumphs over constriction.

I think it is important to mention that when I say the monster within I in no way mean the person with the disorder. Rather, I am referring to the disorder itself. The person is a beautiful human being. The disorder, though within them, does not define them. We are all made in the image of God, therefore God’s image is where their definition is found. God's word says they are altogether beautiful, there is no flaw in them (Song of Solomon 4:7). Yes they struggle. So do I. So do we all. We all have monsters hiding inside of us. But those monsters do not define us. Only God can do that; and He says we are beautiful.

Anyways. It is hard to get help. It is terrifying. And oftentimes we do not think we are bad off enough to need help. But the truth is, we don’t need to hit rock bottom to look for a way out. We can find it at the top, at the middle, at the bottom. It doesn’t matter where you are. There is help for you and there is a way out. It will not be easy. It will take years of trying, failing, and trying again. However, through patience and perseverance it is possible to overcome even the darkest monsters within.

To those of you struggling, I want you to know you are beautiful. You are flawless in the eyes of the Creator. If you are trying to get help, I am so proud of you. If you are considering getting help, I am so proud of you. If you are caught in the throws of the disorder and are not ready to get help, I am still proud of you. If you relapsed after a period of success, I am so proud of you. Celebrate your victories. Even if they are small. Because eventually those small victories can lead to bigger and bigger victories. You, my friends, are beautiful and loved and I am proud of you wherever you are in your battle.

To those of you who know a person with an eating disorder, please know that you are valuable if that person has opened up to you about it. Understand that they are dealing with more than a behavioral problem. They are struggling to give up a developed lifestyle. Help them by encouraging them to seek help for themselves. Celebrate little victories with them, day by day. Love the person behind the disorder. They are still beautiful human beings. Don’t stand idly by. Be a support. And if (and I mean only if) the person’s life is in serious danger, don’t hesitate to call somebody even if it means that person is upset with you for a time. Better an upset friend than a dead one.

Eating disorder is still a scary word for me. I think of all the beautiful people I know who are affected by them. I want them to be well. I want them to feel confident and whole and beautiful and loved, but I know it’s a process. So I encourage anyone and everyone who is struggling or knows somebody who is to seek help, and to keep fighting. I am proud of you, wherever you are. You are loved and cared for and prayed for wherever you are. There is freedom waiting for you. Don’t wait until it is too late to find it.

The National Eating Disorders Association has a hotline available Monday through Thursday 9 AM to 9 PM and Friday from 9 AM to 5 PM.

You may reach the Helpline at (800) 931-2237

There are also support groups available.

For more info call 212.333.3444 ext. 256 or email emilyrosenthal@hotmail.com and put “Group” in the subject line.

Another awesome option is Celebrate Recovery. It is a Christ centered 12 step program for anyone with hurts, habits, and hangups. I can say from personal exerience that this is an absolutely fantastic program that has helped me significantly through my own battle.

For more information check outwww.celebraterecovery.com