I want to start this article off by saying that I have no intention of shaming, berating, or chastising Amanda Jayne Sankey, the author of the 2016 Odyssey article "I Am Not A Feminist, And That Is Okay". After all, feminism is not about tearing down other women who do not share your beliefs; it is about building people up and supporting them no matter what their beliefs are. Therefore, my intentions are not to correct Sankey because she is entitled to her own opinion. Rather, my intentions are to define feminism; specifically, what feminism means to me as well as my friends and family.
In addition, and in accordance with this definition, feminism is not:
1. The Belief That All Women Are Superior
We believe in equality, not superiority.
2. That Someone Has Negative Views Of Men
Which means that not all men are bad.
3. That Feminine Things Are "Bad"
The color pink isn't all that bad and some of us like dresses and skirts (shocking, I know).
4. That Someone Is Gay (And That That's A Bad Thing)
Not all feminists are gay, but being a gay feminist is completely cool.
5. That It's Just Another Word For "Complaining All The Time"
We're not all angry and we don't complain all the time (you're just helping fuel a dangerous stereotype).
6. Men Can't Be Feminists
Anyone of any gender, race, sociology-economic status, religion, or sexual orientation can be a feminist. In fact, according to Aziz Ansari,
"You're a feminist if you go to a Jay Z and Beyonce concert and you're not like, 'Mmm, I feel like Beyonce should get 23 percent less money than Jay Z,' Also, I don't think Beyonce should have the right to vote, and why is Beyonce singing and dancing? Shouldn't she make Jay a steak? I'm sure he's very tired after walking and rapping those two songs.'"
Sankey notes several arguments that apparently make her not a "feminist," but I think what she means to say is that she is not the stereotyped radical feminist that is portrayed on TV and in movies.
Sure, women are considered the more domestic and nurturing type and that's okay if you decide that you want to be a stay-at-home mom. It's okay if you love to cook or bake or do other stereotypical feminine things. It's okay if you want to take you fiancé's last name, and it's okay if you would prefer that your fiancé ask for your father's blessing. This is okay because it your choice: that's what feminism is, the choice and the ability to have that choice.
Hell, I love to bake. I am an elementary education major (wow look at me following in the footsteps of a stereotype). I love working with children and volunteering. I want to get married someday and I want to have someone to lean on. That doesn't make me any less of a feminist. You just have to remember that while you're leaning on someone for support, it doesn't mean you can't lean in.
I am a strong women; I am not weak, nor was I created to be weak. I am smart and I am beautiful. I am an independent woman and no matter what my relationship status might be, I will always be an independent woman (sorry, not sorry @ my future husband). I am a force of nature to be reckoned with, just ask my parents and my friends. I am a feminist and that is okay, in fact, it's more than okay.
