I never once expected to be in a sorority, but I would not be the same girl I am today if it wasn't for the place I once called home. I spent two quarters struggling to find my place in my own sorority before I officially called it quits. These are some of the things that I learned after dropping:
1. You have time for EVERYTHING.
GiphyYou go from attending weekly chapter meetings, new member meetings, mixers and socials, study hours, events, fundraisers, and spending endless amounts of time during your pledge period, to having all the free time in the world. You are no longer required to go to mandatory events, and socializing becomes almost non-existent when you can't associate and interact on a routinely basis with your sisters anymore. You'll also start to see that your schedule and quality of life is vastly different compared to when you were still a member. Getting dinner every Monday at 7 with your roommate because you no longer have to attend chapter meeting is now part of your weekly routine.
2. You realize who your true friends are.
GiphyBeing in a sisterhood seems promising at first - the comfort of having a sister to study, workout, go to class, and eat with is automatic when you join a sorority. Panhellenic sororities are huge, and it takes time and effort to get to know all the girls in your organization. In reality, you're probably only close with a handful of girls - and that's normal. However, once you drop, it's a different story. Not everybody you used to talk to will recognize or acknowledge you on campus. True colors will be revealed.
3. You experience freedom. A lot of it.
GiphyYou are no longer being told what to wear, what to post on social media, or how to behave. That's not to say you go wild once you drop your sorority, but rather the feeling of being free is overwhelming at first. It took me a while to realize how to be independent and how to incorporate other priorities into my life, but it felt like my life was finally coming together. I was doing better in class, and I took time to figure out what my hobbies and other interests were. I could go home whenever I wanted to, have a steady job schedule, and not drop my money on things I felt I could spend on elsewhere worth more to me.
4. You stop spending money... on EVERYTHING.
GiphyThe dress and heels you need to start looking for a few weeks before semi or formal is coming up? The meeting attire you need to buy ASAP so you don't get marked tardy or absent? That fundraiser event you want to go to at 7PM after class? The T-shirts you need to buy if your dues aren't all inclusive? Paying your dues? ALL GONE. You'll start to realize just how costly being in a sorority is. If anything, dropping made me more financially responsible by allowing me to see that I have other expenses to pay and save up for.
5. You don't deal with drama anymore.
GiphyLet's be honest, an organization with a group of girls involves some drama. That's not to say every sorority girl goes around and gossips, but cliques form and tea will begin to spill. Once you drop though, you start to really feel how effortless and drama-free your current life is.
6. You might feel sad.
GiphySad that you didn't experience your first, second, or last formal recruitment. Sad that you have a pretty dress hanging in your closet that you would wear to formal but you no longer can't. Sad that you didn't graduate as an alumna. Sad that you didn't have the guts to hold that leadership position you were thinking of doing. Sad seeing other girls attend the same events you would have if you were still active. Sad seeing the million posts on Instagram about big/little reveal and missing out on being a big.
7. You will feel out of place.
GiphyCollege is a huge place. Being in a sorority makes college a less scarier place and allows you to interact with other members in Greek life with little to no effort. Show up to a frat social, and the chances are, your big or a sister is talking to faces you've never seen before. Greek life instantly makes you a social butterfly, but once you no longer have that foundation, you might find it hard to find where you belong on campus if you aren't involved in something else. But that's the purpose of college - to explore your academic and social interests. Only you are responsible for choosing the life you want to live.
8. You have other options.
GiphyJoining a sorority will consume most of your social life and time throughout college. Being in Greek life might hold you back from finding a new hobby, getting a job, or having friends outside of your sorority due to the lack of time, money, or both. I know when I was still an initiated member, I found it a bit overwhelming to balance work, school, and attending to the needs of being in my sorority. Because I rushed as a first-year, I've always felt that a part of me missed out on finding a more diverse group of friends through another organization on campus. I actually wish I could go back and start my freshman year joining a club that didn't come with the time and financial constraints that I had being a sorority girl.
9. You don't deal with the stress of getting fined for missing events.
GiphyPaying a hefty fine for missing an event, due to personal, health, or work-related issues was something I had to go through a lot as an active member. Excuses were not being approved easily, and having work on the weekends that always clashed with major events left me mentally drained and unstable. To me, I clearly had other priorities that weighed more on my scale, and I no longer loved my membership enough to continue paying for it. Paying for events I knew I couldn't even attend made me frustrated - my money was going down the drain while I wasn't even putting in a lot of effort on my part to bond with other girls that would have made me appreciate the meaning of sisterhood.
10. You are going to be okay.
GiphyLet me start by saying that dropping my sorority was one of the hardest decisions I've made this year. It is not something I did compulsively, but rather through a series of my own gut feelings. In the end, my decision was solely based on the status of my mental health. At that point, I was not happy with who I was. I needed a change. I wanted to fully take care of myself first all while still adjusting to college my freshman year. Dropping a sorority does NOT mean it's the end of the world. You will have a great social life, and you will make new friends. It boils down to one thing: your emotional health should always come first. To this day, I can honestly say that dropping my sorority was the right choice for me.
- To The Girl Who Wants To Drop Her Sorority ›
- Why Dropping My Sorority Was The Best Decision I've Ever Made ›
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