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Drake, Now That You're 30...

I’ve decided to suggest some new, more age appropriate, song titles.

Nov 01, 2016

Happy (belated) birthday to the man who’s done it all. Drake, legally known as Aubrey Drake Graham, is a man of many talents. First off, he flawlessly portrayed Jimmy, a teen in a wheelchair, for almost 7 years on "Degrassi: The Next Generation." He then transformed his career and threw himself into the rap game. He is known for his songs that will make you think about texting your ex or ones that empower us to rise from the bottom. Well, it’s crazy to say but Drake is now 30 YEARS OLD! WHO WOULD’VE THOUGHT!! And even though his music is genius, I’ve decided to suggest some new, more age appropriate, song titles. Drake- I hope you’re reading.

1. 9 (AM)

Drake, you are now 30 years old. It’s time to ditch the late night clubbing and get your full 8 hours of sleep. Leave the club appearances and bottle poppin’ to the kids.

Suggested Lyric to the tune of his original song 9: Alarm go rang rang, bed time’s my favorite thing (It’s not plagarsim if you’re somewhat copying yourself!)

2. Bills Bills Bills (Remix)

Obviously it is hard to copy the highly acclaimed Destiny’s Child classic (click here to check it out), but I think good old Drake can conquer the challenge. Instead of the topic of a man mooching off his woman, Drake can just go on a rant about how awful it must be that he has to pay all these bills. A mortgage, water bills, even the good old medical bill to replace a broken hip; Drake can write about it all.

3. A Night In

Drake is popular for his love ballads. Personally, a song talking about a night in watching CSI or some other NBC primetime show, cuddling up with his “bae” (RIP Drihanna), would make for the perfect song. Nothing is better than a song that will shed a few tears- especially one written by the King of Rap.

4. Wifey

Instead of getting us missing our ex, Drake should write a nice song about settling down. I mean who wouldn’t want to get married to a softie like Drake? (RIP Drihanna part 2). Instead of facing heartbreak, Drake can get a happy ending loving a girl who loves him too.

Listen, Drake is a grown man now, and I don’t want to write his WHOLE album for him. Drake, I hope you will take some of my suggestions into consideration, as I am just looking to help. Anyways, happy birthday Drake! Age is just a number so you keep doing you (but I still suggest getting your full eight hours, you need your beauty sleep).

Love,

A Fan

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Drake, Now That You're 30...

I’ve decided to suggest some new, more age appropriate, song titles.

1. 9 (AM)

2. Bills Bills Bills (Remix)

3. A Night In

4. Wifey

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1."But what would happen if we all tried to be like Santa and learned to give as only he can give: of ourselves, our talents, our love and our hearts? Maybe we could all learn Santa's beautiful lesson and maybe there would finally be peace on Earth and good will toward men."

"Sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can't see."

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13. Why is it called "quick sand" if you sink slowly in it?

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15. If Cinderella's shoe fit perfectly, why did it fall off?

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