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The Votes Are In: You Can Stop

Go ahead and throw on some sweats, make yourself a cup of tea, get comfy, .. and stop doing these things during quarantine.

Henrietta Bilokur

Apr 28, 2020

University of Kentucky

static01.nyt.com

So... this is week ___ (I have no clue I'm going insane and have lost all motivation) of quarantine and there are a few things that I think we need to discuss. A certain few people have managed to make their mark during this COVID season and I am not surprised. Would it even be a global pandemic if we didn't have a few of those cringe-worthy moments?

Welcome to my TedRant™.

The Social "Social" Distancers

This is number one for a reason, the one good thing about this quarantine is that there's no FOMO because its something EVERYONE SHOULD BE DOING. But of course, we have our social try-hards that want to post their sickly kick-back-sesh only on their Snapchat stories so their moms can't get on their ass for it.

People Making Money Off the Pandemic

This one REALLY grinds my gears, various corporations have begun advertising masks with no mention of charitable donation, they're humbly making money off of our safety and wellbeing, fun right?

Vanessa Hudgens

You know why.

Any Group Of Celebrities Singing Together

Gal Gadot sweetie, the thought was there it really was. But I don't think at the time us normal folk were too busy trying not to die than wanting to watch wonder women and the rest of the millionaires sing Imagine off-tune.

Throwback Traveling Instagramers

"The wish I was there" posts are really, really been there done that, literally. Everyone wishes they were somewhere else too, not just you. Did you just want to show off the fact that you went to Bali in 2017? take a seat.

Billionaires Complaining about Quarantine

As I sip on my boxed wine sangria and eat Annie's mac n' cheese out of my lap scrolling through my Instagram stories the last thing I want to do is listen to celebrities complain about how they are stuck summering at their Malibu beach-side villa as they sip Postmated martinis by their infinity pool.

That One Ex that Texts You Every time You're Back Home

That classic "you back home for the summer?" text has morphed into the "hey how are you and your family doing during this time?" text. Ahhh, the sweet taste of yesteryear, a bit bitter huh?

Doomsday Preppers

Buying 700 rolls of toilet paper I'm sure is very beneficial to you and your only child, but before your next reach for all that TP think of poor old, frail Eugene who ventured to the grocery store with a promise to his wife Hilda that he would return home with a 2 pack Charmin Ultra Strong to last them the year.

People That Have Claimed Sobriety

I hate you, but applaud you at the same time.

I can't get Cardi B yelling CORONA VIRUS at us out of my head, please help.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Recommended for you

The Votes Are In: You Can Stop

Go ahead and throw on some sweats, make yourself a cup of tea, get comfy, .. and stop doing these things during quarantine.

In This Article:

The Social "Social" Distancers

People Making Money Off the Pandemic

Vanessa Hudgens

Any Group Of Celebrities Singing Together

Throwback Traveling Instagramers

Billionaires Complaining about Quarantine

That One Ex that Texts You Every time You're Back Home

Doomsday Preppers

People That Have Claimed Sobriety

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Because have you ever had to endure grilling your foot on a George Foreman?

1. When he just wanted bacon from his George Foreman grill

2. When he had money (and Jan) issues

3. When he got upstaged at Phyllis' wedding

4. When he unintentionally saved Meredith from rabies

5. When he wore a "bisexual" suit

6. When he had to apologize to Jesus

7. When his GPS drove him into a lake

8. When he had to deal with Ryan as his boss

9. When he couldn't fulfill his most generous empty promise

10. When this happened

11. When he struggled with a X-Mas break up

12. When he had to defend his generosity

13. When he threw a classy Christmas party for Holly but she had a boyfriend

14. When he had to stand up to peer pressure

15. When Toby was "Toby-ish"

This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

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