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Doughs Over Bros

Why Donuts Are Better Than Boys

Nicole Barbuto

Oct 13, 2015

Fairleigh Dickinson University

884

Boys come and go but doughnuts are forever.

1. Doughnuts are there for you at any time of the day

Not just at 2 a.m. when it's convenient for them.

2. Doughnuts don't stick around long enough for you to get bored with them

Because you already ate them before you even pulled out of the Dunkin Donuts parking lot.

3. Doughnuts look so good when they're dressed up.

Yeah a boy looks good in a suit, but have you ever seen a sprinkled doughnut?

4. You can see right through a doughnut

They aren't a jerk disguised as a frat star who loves his mom.

5. Doughnuts are always fresh

Fresh as in "freshly baked", not fresh as in "rude" (not being able to text you back but miraculously still being able to post Snapchats of them-self at the bar).

6. Doughnuts always give you options (frosted, glazed, powdered, sprinkled, etc.)

Sure there are millions of boys in the world, but they all have one thing in common - they're all the same.

7. Doughnuts will always hold a special place in our hearts

Boys are a dime a dozen. Doughnuts are $8.99.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Doughs Over Bros

Why Donuts Are Better Than Boys

1. Doughnuts are there for you at any time of the day

2. Doughnuts don't stick around long enough for you to get bored with them

3. Doughnuts look so good when they're dressed up.

4. You can see right through a doughnut

5. Doughnuts are always fresh

6. Doughnuts always give you options (frosted, glazed, powdered, sprinkled, etc.)

7. Doughnuts will always hold a special place in our hearts

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The world's greatest university meets the world's greatest show.

1. When you get your acceptance letter

2. When you try to figure out how class enrollment works

3. When it’s move in day

4. When you arrive on campus and see all of the attractive people

5. FROG Week

6. When you find your squad

7. When you visit DHall (RIP) or EHall for the first time

8. When you take on way too many credits

9. When you go to your first party at JMU

10. When the rival school shows up for the homecoming game (or any game really)

11. Sunday Brunch

12. When you see the infamous “preacher” for the first time

13. The first snow day

14. Madipalooza

15. When finals week rolls around

16. When you have to say goodbye

17. And when you finally get to go back

Do you have a small get-together or throw a big bash?

1. Your family and friends ask what you want for your birthday, so you give them a list of options.

2. You're super excited about your birthday the week before.

3. Your family flies in town to celebrate with you.

4. Your siblings wake you up.

5. Your friends are so excited to be with you on your big day.

6. If you work, your office might throw a party for you.

7. For your actual party, you plan a small get-together with close family and friends ...

8. ... or large celebration with everyone you know.

9. You eat the best meal you've had in weeks.

10. You devour the first piece of cake proudly.

11. You embarrass yourself somehow.

12. You get the present you really wanted but thought no one would get you.

13. You are a little sad about getting older.

14. That feeling wears off and you realize how happy you are to have family and friends to celebrate this day with you.

15. The morning after your birthday looks something like this.

Syllabus week doesn't exist.

You can forget to breathe OR to buy fruit OR to even pet a dog but you cannot forget these things!!

All names should be "unisex names."

1. Communicating via email can be awkward.

2. Appointments usually accompany weird looks.

3. Introducing yourself to someone is never without a hitch.

4. You’ve probably thought about changing your name.

5. You’re often asked why you have the name you do.

6. You get excited when you meet someone of your gender with your name.

7. You feel awkward when you meet someone of the opposite gender with your name.

8. You’ve had someone say to you, “I knew a [your name], but they were [your opposite gender].”

9. You’ve heard a bad joke/pick-up line or two about your name before.

10. People are surprised when they see you.

11. You’re extra sensitive to other unique or unisex names.

12. You’ve fought with your parents about it.

13. All things considered, you’re happy your name makes you unique.

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