I bus to and from my college every day. I have to be there, and have, essentially, for three years, except for the rare occasion when a friend would offer me a ride. I get up hours before my classes begin and usually leave for school two hours before class starts, just to get in on time. I walk to the bus stop on the other side of the main road, and I stand there in whatever weather, waiting for the bus to arrive.
But it isn't the early wake-up time that bothers me most. It isn't the commute that's just short of two hours. It isn't crossing the main road on morning traffic.
It's the way I get treated, just standing on the side of the road, waiting for the bus.
On milder days, people just stare at me when they're stuck in traffic like I'm some sort of show to behold. As if I'm going to jump in front of their car. This isn't as bothersome as it is uncomfortable. Oftentimes, I'll feel their eyes on me and make eye contact with them, middle-aged man or old woman, until they get uncomfortable and look away.
These days aren't terrible, but they aren't ideal.
The days that are terrible, though, are the ones that occur most often. People don't look away from me when I look at them, don't feel shame. People honk at me. Men yell at me through their car windows, things I never really catch over the sounds traffic but know from the look in their eyes aren't good.
Just because I'm standing on the side of the road means that I'm eye candy. I'm something to look at. I may as well be walking around naked, the way these men treat me, even under my coat.
The problem here isn't that I'm standing on the side of a busy road to catch the bus. The problem here isn't that I don't drive. It isn't what I'm wearing. These things don't bother a large amount of the people who pass me by every day on my commutes. Most people just pass by in their cars, possibly looking at me out of their peripheral vision. No big deal, no offense taken.
The problem is how these people, mainly men, have been taught to view women: always sexual, and always objects if they don't know is personally.
Listen: I am a beautiful young woman. Any woman is beautiful. I both understand and appreciate that. However, you don't see me shouting at and staring at women in public. You don't see me screaming at them for doing something as simple as standing in a particular spot, and that's the way things should be.
Us women waiting for the bus, we're just going about our daily lives. Do us a favor and do the same.
