Peer pressure, while normally targeted as a warning sign to college students and younger, is something that is faced throughout all aspects of life. The only reason why adults don’t face the same lecture in their workplace is because, let’s face it, by then you’re expected to know better.

There is positive and negative peer pressure. Positive peer pressure can be when all of your friends are yelling at you in a group chat for not having started your school project yet. Or being softly motivated to face your fears of going on a rollercoaster for the first time. Positive peer pressure helps you grow. Positive peer pressure is not the problem.

Negative peer pressure, however, is in the form of having a drink that you don’t want to have at a party...and then another one. Negative peer pressure is being insulted for not having lost your virginity or still being a “prude.” Negative peer pressure hosts many examples, and you almost always recognize it when it’s happening.

But let me ask you this...if you are set on how you want to live your life, then who is in the wrong for trying to convince you otherwise? You for being sure of yourself, or the person (or people) trying to push you to do something you don’t want to do? Having strong morals and keeping them is a character trait that is extremely underrated. You are the only one in charge of your life, so why is it that people who have no right to have any influence have a say? Not to mention, why is it that you let them have that say?

Negative influences are not always from outside sources, though. Most of the time a person is so afraid of how they will be perceived that they act accordingly to the fears in their head. I will tell you this, I have been to my share of parties in my life. I have never once been made fun of for refusing to drink. I will openly tell people when they offer to give me one, that I don’t drink. The usual reaction is shocking, but I’ve found that most people will actually react with a sort of respect, saying “wow, good for you” and things of that nature. It’s refreshing, considering the fact that when I first faced the situation, the fears in my head told me that everyone would react otherwise. But the truth is, no one really cares. And, um, why should they care? Caring to such an extent means that they’re bullying you. Stick up for yourself.

Having strong morals is an admirable thing. If you’re with a guy or girl and they want you to do something you’re not comfortable with, tell them. Why should they have the right to pressure you and you don’t have the right to fight back? If you’re afraid of not looking cool or desirable, that’s a confidence problem, honey. Work on that. Now.

Knowing who you are is not something you figure out overnight. But I started by asking myself, without the influence of the world around me, what do I actually like or care about? My decisions on how to live my life are not decisions that everyone needs to make for themselves. And the examples I listed are only two examples of the hundreds that people face every day. Unless it’s in an effort to better yourself, like being kind or respectful, don’t let people tell you to live your life differently. Stand your ground, you got this.

Live life to the fullest, loves. You can’t do that with regrets Xx