We have created a culture that leaves. When things get hard, we leave. When we experience pain, we leave. When we have to take a look at ourselves, and potentially change our hearts, we leave.

We have been told that we deserve to leave. We deserve to be happy. We deserve to have all that we want. We have been told that if something hurts, it is probably not right. That if a relationship is hard, it is probably not the right relationship. That if we face obstacles at work, maybe that job just isn’t the right fit.

Now, I am not saying that we should stay in situations that are emotionally, physically or spiritually damaging to us. There are abusive relationships, unhealthy environments, and toxic people that we should absolutely remove ourselves from. But there are many situations that do not fall under any of those categories. They are just difficult situations. Situations that are painful or uncomfortable. And we leave simply because we are in pain.

We leave beautiful marriages because the relationship no longer feels the way it did in the beginning, because now we fight and no longer seem to be on the same page. We leave jobs that we are called to because the people we work with hurt us or don’t meet our expectations. We pick up and move to new cities with the hopes that in this new place we will finally find the elusive happiness that we desire.

But what if it is all of this leaving that is actually causing us pain? What if staying is what will lead to true freedom, true contentment?

Because there is great healing to be found in seeing a difficult situation through. There are great lessons to be learned each time we walk through a dark valley. When we avoid the valley, we will keep coming back to it until we actually cross through it. We want what the other side of the valley holds, but we don’t want to walk through the difficulties to get there. However, what we don’t realize is that we cannot possess what is on the other side of the valley until we walk through the valley. It is the valley that will make us strong. It is the valley that will refine us. It is the valley that will remind us who we really are. It is the valley that will make us into the person we need to be in order to possess what is on the mountaintop on the other side.

I don’t know what valley you face right now. I don’t know what it is that you are considering giving up on. But I beg you, please don’t give up. Please don’t leave. You have the strength within you to keep going. You have the strength within you to keep fighting. What lies on the other side of your fight is well-worth the battle. Yes, it will be painful. Yes, it will be difficult. But it will make you into the person that you are meant to be. It will prepare you for your calling. Don’t avoid it. We need you to stay, so that you can become who you were meant to be, so that you can do what you are meant to do in this world.