Stigmas are a part of our everyday life, and the sad truth behind that is that stigmas are used as labels to define us. Everyday talk and new "lingo" that is administered into our lives are stigmas that go unrecognized. For example, you call the girl who sits alone at lunch weird, she hears you but she ignores it. You start to say it more and more around her and it starts to bring her down. Not only is this bullying, but this is an example of the labeling theory and a social stigma. The labeling theory is a theory by Howard Becker that says that what you are labeled as is what you act like. The girl sitting alone is shy, but she starts to distort her thoughts as her being weird. She gets to the point where she doesn’t make any friends because she believes she is weird and people like her shouldn’t have friends. She will carry this stigma with her throughout most if not all of her life, and let it weigh her down as if it defines her.
Have Your Voice Heard: Become an Odyssey Creator
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No matter who you are, you will struggle from time to time in your educational system. Imagine being the kid in the class that's labeled not as smart as everyone else. You believe you are when you can't figure out your math problems and you can't understand why. When you don't have answers, you let other people's opinions weigh in more than they should, sometimes even more than your own. I know what this is like because I was someone like this. I struggled in school for most of my life, even though at times I had to work ten times harder than anyone else. My stigma I placed on myself was that I wasn't as smart as everyone else. I started to believe maybe I was just dumb and I couldn't fix it. I made the self deprecating jokes as everyone does at times about they're biggest insecurities, and I got laughs and not too many disagrees. I started to tell myself it'll be okay to fail the test because I tried as hard as I could and because I wasn't as smart as everyone else I'd settle for that 70 on the exam. Or, I wouldn't study as hard as I should've because I knew there was no point. I've learned now that if you put the work in, you see the results. Don't let stigmas hold you back from your full potential.
On a personal note, I grew up with a group of girl friends that were never much like me as time went on. I was the shy girl that kinda kept to herself, but when it came to being with my friends I tried very hard to be well liked.
As time went on, I was labeled as the annoying friend. Time and time again that's what I was referred to as, and it started to get to me. I have always been a shy girl, but it got even more intense as the years went on. I started to wonder what made me annoying (for I was being myself) or why I was the one made fun of when there was an audience. I told myself I was annoying, so I did my own thing for a while, making myself distant from my "friends." I started to not speak around new people a lot because I was scared they'd think I was annoying like my friends had said I was. It began to affect my everyday life, especially when I went to college. I never talked to anyone new and I kept getting asked why I had been so shy.
One thing that I noticed a lot was that no one ever invited me to do things, or every reached out to me first. No one ever walked up to me to say hello or to introduce themselves, and it ate at me more and more everyday. I took it personal when it wasn't. No one knew me, no one probably even knew I existed, nor had they had ever heard my voice most likely. As I began to recognize this I opened up more and I made some friends. I wasn't annoying just because two girls thought so, I was great and I didn't let anyone get to figure that out because this stigma held me back.
The labeling theory works in demeaning ways and it is not used how it should be. We should be labeling people in positive ways, not labels that bring them down. If we could use labels positively, they could be used more effectively, and help in many aspects of life. Labeling people in positive ways brings us one step closer adjusting to new norms in society, which is somethings very hard for us as a nation.
Stigmas are stapled into the minds of many men and women just like me. Whether it's them believing their not good enough, not skinny enough, not good looking, etc.. Never let a stigma bring you down, you are not a label, you're a person. Lastly, if you see a stranger sitting alone, or someone who doesn't talk much when other people are around, don't ignore it, take action. Invite that person to have lunch with you, and say hello in passing, you never know how much such a little task could do for someone.
