Who Am I? | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Lifestyle

Who Am I?

Who is Anyone?

4
Who Am I?
dafont

“I don’t know who I am.”

I used to think that saying that was a cliche.

How could we not know who we are? We as people live with ourselves and only ourselves every single minute of every day. We know every facet of the Freudian-proposed composition of our minds; our ego, our alter-ego, all of it.

I suddenly realized I have no idea who I am. My only identity that remains; someone who wants to glorify God.

That is good to a certain extent but I don’t even know how to go about that anymore. I pray every single day that at least one thing I do could glorify Him. I do everything you are supposed to. I do the normal legalistic action, to call them by their worst pseudonym. I don’t drink, do drugs, have sex, flirt with random people. I pray, read my Bible and love people. I love people more than anyone could imagine. I don’t know how one person can love so much.

Maybe it's because I give away every ounce of love I can. That even the love-capacity that many people opt to save for themselves. Maybe that is what I am here for, maybe I can teach just one other person how to love. Maybe my ability to love has saved lives-okay-not just maybe. I KNOW that God has put me here and has saved lives through me simply because I am able to love.

Many of you know some of my biggest struggles. I am very open about them, because to me, if people see me as flawed it doesn’t matter. Any poor opinion you have of me pales in comparison to how I have felt about myself, I am not going to hide anymore especially if even one person is able to love themselves just a little more from this…it's worth it.

These struggles make me feel as if it is impossible for anyone to love me, that I am not worthy, that I--am nothing. This painfully beautiful dichotomy exists and manifests in the world; God made us, loves us, wants us even though we are in reality, nothing in comparison. We could do nothing to Glorify the Lord. We are less than a single grain of sand, all of which comprise all the beaches in the world; past, present and future. We are less than a single cell in the whole body of Christ, yet, God utilizes each and every one of us to Glorify Him in some way.

THAT has become the only identity I have left. I am this cell, that has no idea my purpose. It may sound silly…but am I a portion of the heart? Or am I a portion of the lowliest pinky toe? What am I and how can God utilize me? It is a good thing He is all powerful, because I can not do anything without Him.

I have lived with myself every single day for almost two decades, it amazes me. I can not tell anyone who I am other than this. In all reality, who is anyone? How do we have the right to categorize? How do we choose what qualities to reward, condone, or shun?

It certainly is not always biblical. It certainly isn’t always out of love. How do we choose what sin is more important? I have so many questions. Yet, the one I am struggling with most is “Who am I?” Ultimately, I don’t judge anyone else because all I can do is love them, help them, and be almost an assistant-shepard to them. I don’t think less of anyone, for the Bible brings up the idea of which debtor will be more thankful and give more praise… those who are forgiven the most debt. Saul was Paul, he persecuted Christians… I don’t in any way condone sin… I just don’t believe that any sin is necessarily worse than another, or more, that I have absolutely no right to decipher that for myself. I do, however have the power to love, protect, guide and so much more.

Who am I? I honestly, don’t even know. I pray every day to learn… or rather, that I can be utilized… That I can glorify God… That I can be purified in; mind, body, soul, spirit, everything… I pray every day that I can understand God’s will.

I have to be honest, I don’t.

I don’t understand.

I have no idea who I am.

I don’t know who I am.

Who Am I?

Who are You?

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

A Few Thoughts Every College Freshman Has

The transition into adulthood is never easy

12784
Mays Island
Courtney Jones

Today I started my third week of college at Minnesota State Moorhead. I have survived welcome week, finding my classes on the first day, and being an awkward loner in the dining hall. Even though I have yet to be here for a month, I have already experienced many thoughts and problems that only a new college student can relate to.

Keep Reading...Show less
college

"Make sure to get involved when you're in college!"

We've all heard some variation of this phrase, whether it came from parents, other family members, friends, RAs, or college-related articles. And, like many clichés, it's true for the most part. Getting involved during your college years can help you make friends, build your resume, and feel connected to your campus. However, these commitments can get stressful if you're dealing with personal issues, need to work, or aren't sure how to balance classes and everything else going on during the semester.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

9 Reasons Why Friends Are Essential In College

College without friends is like peanut butter without jelly.

5629
Bridgaline Liberati and friends
Bridgaline Liberati

In college, one of the essential things to have is friends. Yes, textbooks, a laptop, and other school supplies are important but friends are essential. Friends are that support system everybody needs. The more friends you have the better the support system you have. But you also have someone to share experiences with. And don’t settle for just one or two friends because 8 out of 10 times they are busy and you are studying all alone. Or they have other friend groups that do not include you. Don’t settle for just one or two friends; make as many friends as you can. After the first couple of weeks of college, most friend groups are set and you may be without friends.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

The Power of Dressing Up

Why it pays to leave the hoodie at home.

4164
sneakers and heels
Sister | Brother Style - Word Press

For a moment your world is spinning. The phone alarm has just scared you awake and you’re flooded by daunting thoughts of the day ahead. You have three assignments due and little time to work on them because of your job. You’re running late because you’ve hit snooze one to many times after yesterday’s long hours. You dizzily reach for a hoodie, craving its comfort, and rush for a speedy exit, praying you will have time to pick up coffee. Does this sound familiar?

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

11 Signs You Live At The Library As Told by 'Parks And Recreation'

A few signs that you may live in the library whether you'd like to admit it or not.

3643
brown wooden book shelves with books

Finals week is upon us. It is a magical time of year during which college students everywhere flock to the library in attempt to learn a semester's worth of knowledge in only a week. For some students, it's their first time in the library all semester, maybe ever. Others have slaved away many nights under the fluorescent lights, and are slightly annoyed to find their study space being invaded by amateurs. While these newbies wander aimlessly around the first floor, hopelessly trying to find a table, the OGs of the library are already on the third floor long tables deep into their studies. Here is a few signs that you may live in the library, whether you'd like to admit it or not.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments