Ask me a question. Anything, just ask it. Before you even ask it, I’ll tell you my answer…I don't know. I’m not being indecisive (OK, maybe a little bit), or trying to be that “cutesy dumb girl” twirling my hair saying it. I legitimately just don't know.
"I don’t know" is the best answer I have at this point in my life. I’m 20 years old; I can only handle one decision at a time right now. And most of the time its “what should I eat for dinner?” Or, “what should I wear to go out in tonight?” And even then, I don’t know. Should I make Ramen for the fourth night this week? Or go get Burger King chicken nuggets and treat myself? I don't know. Should I even go out tonight? Should I wear jeans or leggings? I have literally no clue. Study or just finish this season of "Gilmore Girls" on Netflix? That is sometimes my hardest choice of the week.
So when you ask me where I want to be in five years…I have no idea. I’m just hoping I’m not completely poor and have finally graduated college. What do I want to do for the rest of my life? I don't even know how to answer that. In theory, In theory I want to own seven dogs and earn a doctor's salary to decorate Christmas trees for a living. I’ve changed my major more times than I remember so I could be anything from an elementary school teacher, to an accountant, to a nurse. Who knows? Not me.
So when you ask me a question, and I answer “I don't know,” you have to take that as a real answer. I’m young, I’m still allowed to not have a clue about things. I’m still learning about myself and what kinds of things I love and hate about life on this Earth. I don't have to know my everyday schedule quite yet. I can roll with what happens and pick and choose what I feel like doing today. Sleep until 2, and then watch Netflix? Sure. Wake up at 8 a.m., clean the house, learn German, and in bed by 10 p.m.? Maybe. I can choose how my day goes, how my week or month goes. I can do what I want, and I don’t owe a real answer to anyone except myself. So deal with my “I don’t know.”
I don’t know is my answer and I’m totally OK with that. I’ll figure my shit out eventually.
