Contrary to popular belief, physical illness is not the only source of pain or sickness. Of course, if there is something abnormal in our bodies or some foreign particle or organism interacts with our biological systems, then we can become sick. However, this isn't always the case. There are some diseases and feelings of illness that are caused by physical pains and symptoms, but then there are others that are purely of the heart and of the mind and are not visible on a CT scan or under a microscope.

In all honesty, there are some pains that people feel that are not diagnosable by any physician or other healthcare professional. That does not mean there is anything wrong with us when we feel this way. Though you and I may know that it's okay to feel pain from heartbreak or losing someone, it may not be so clear to others. We live in a society where we ridicule each other if we show "soft" emotions like pain, sadness, loneliness or fear and as such, people tend to let their emotions build up inside of them without a release.

Have you ever seen a covered pot of boiling water? Or heard a kettle whistling? Because of all the energy that builds up from the water molecules transitioning from liquid to vapor state, there is an extreme amount of pressure that builds up when water boils. When this happens, someone takes the cover off the pot and the kettle starts letting out steam until someone turns it off. What do human beings have in common with these objects? There comes a point when we are like a kettle: We can keep emotions in for a certain length of time until it starts hurting us even more. I myself am guilty of this.

We need to break away from the notion that showing emotion makes us weak or that there's anything at all wrong with crying or any other show of emotion. Granted, people all release their emotions in different ways. If you're the type of person who cries when you're sad, then go right ahead and cry. I'll sit by you and hand you tissues. If you're the type of person who paints, sings, dances or releases emotion in some other way, go ahead and do you. Think about you first, not what people think of your pain or how you let it out. The people who stand to the side while you go through pain or ridicule you for crying aren't the type of people you need in your life anyway.

I've never had any major losses in my family until my grandmother passed away, and her death hit me like a ton of bricks. When I found out she had passed away, I was getting ready to go to work; and because I had been somewhat conditioned to think death and dying wasn't a big deal, I went to work anyway. Big mistake. Some things you can keep inside and some things—like that secret you promised not to tell—you just can't keep inside. I had bawled my eyes out before leaving for work and thought I was okay. But then I got to work and I just felt even worse. I started crying and just couldn't stop. After crying I sort of felt better, but I had a headache from crying so much. What I'm trying to say is some pains can never or will never go away, but we can dull them over time. Crying is one way to do that. If you're not the crying type, then do what you do and let it all out--or as much as you can. There are ways to release what we feel that won't hurt us, hurt others or cause us to have feelings of regret. Here is a list of things to do when you want to let it out.

1. Cry it out (it doesn't have to be pretty, either).

2. Sing or scream it out.

3. Dance it out.

4. Paint, draw or write it out.

5. And the list goes on...

There are things in the world that will always be somewhat mysterious to us. One of these mysteries is how we can release emotion, something that is not able to be touched or felt, and feel a whole lot better afterward. Don't let anyone prevent you from releasing your emotions; don't keep it all pent up inside.