Why We Should Not Hurt Someone's Feelings | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Self Love

Why We Should Not Hurt Someone's Feelings

Feelings can cause physical damage.

596
Why We Should Not Hurt Someone's Feelings
https://www.pexels.com/photo/black-and-white-photo-of-holding-hands-735978/

What I am tired of hearing is that we should "rub some dirt in it." Yes, we are not supposed to coddle the ego of another person, but we are also supposed to be considerate of their feelings. The ego and the heart should never be confused. The ego of a person is their own sense of importance in relation to other people, and the heart is the ultimate motivator for how a person keeps their inner drive to pursue their interests and goals.

Using words of affirmation, people tend to confuse the ego and the heart to be the same part of the personality of a person. We tell people that we cherish them because that is words of affirmation. However, flattery can be confused to be genuine words of affirmation—words like "you are the most important person in this group, you're cuter/smarter/funnier than anyone else" are fluffs to the ego that do not actually help people. Inflating a person's ego is mostly not synonymous with words of affirmation. While the metaphorical heart holds the dearest parts of life for a person, the ego is like a trophy case with a window display for every "trophy" of that person. People may want a trophy, but they need a heart. We need the part of our personality that upholds our values and sense of what is important to us. People seek to protect the love they have for their families, friends, and other parts that reinforce their sense of self. The ego, however, can be misconstrued as a more important part of the personality even though it is not.

Hurting someone's feelings can actually cause physical damage. This is because social rejection is usually stressful for the people that must undergo it. According to Psychology Today, all emotions have a motor component.

This implies that every emotion will be felt by our body as well as our mind. It can cause tension in different muscle groups.

However, the most important reason why feelings are important is the same reason why we equate our feelings to our heart in the middle of our chest.

The truth is that both emotional pain and physical pain are identified to be synonymous by the brain. This is due to the neural circuits within the brain being wired to treat both emotional and physical pain as the same entity. Emotional and physical pain are both interpreted within the anterior cingulate cortex. Guess what else the anterior cingulate cortex coincidentally controls? Heart rate and blood pressure. BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE. The anterior cingulate cortex also happens to play a part in decision-making, evaluation processes, emotional regulation, preparation tasks, AND error detection.

The implications for the same exact area in the brain to regulate both our heart and our feelings is vital: the physical health of our heart is correlated with the emotional health regulated by our anterior cingulate cortex. Another implication includes that our decision-making is heavily intertwined with the physical health of our heart as well as our emotions.

This is why there is a syndrome called Broken Heart syndrome. When a person undergoes enough stress from painful emotions, such as a surprising break-up or the death of a loved one, that person can develop Broken Heart syndrome. This is when one area of the heart has difficulty functioning, so the rest of the areas try to compensate and keep the heart pumping. Emotions have been proven to influence the heartbeat and heart pressure, so to hurt someone's feelings can be considered to also hurt someone's physical heart.

However, notice how the ego has nothing to do with the anterior cingulate cortex. A person's ego has nothing to do with the physical regulation of someone's heart. You can hurt someone's ego without hurting their heart.

This is why people call most of their emotional attachments and meaningful experiences to be a "part of their heart." Each of these attachments and experiences did have an influence on their physical heart. This is because both the heart and emotions include regulation with the anterior cingulate cortex.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Entertainment

Disney magic for New Year!

The "Happiest Place on Earth" has a lot of characters with some pretty great advice.

4734
Disney magic kingdom castle on new years
StableDiffusion

Disney movies are well known and very popular in today's world. Although many people appreciate the plot and the storyline, not many people appreciate the wisdom these characters possess. Every Disney movie has unique advice that can be applied to everyday life. Here are 11 Disney quotes to help start your New Year off right:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

40 Gift Ideas for the Indecisive

It's a time of love, family, memory-making, and gift-giving. But also a time of stressing over the perfect gift.

119088
Christmas gifts around a tree
StableDiffusion

It's officially December. There is less than a month of 2024, and I still feel like yesterday was summer. Now comes the merriest time of the year, the Christmas season.

Everyone has been waiting for this time of year since mid-October (which is way too early, in my opinion) or before. It's a time of love, family, memory-making, and gift-giving. A lot of times when I ask friends and family what they want, I get a lot of "I don't know" or "I don't care."

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Bucket List To Live In The Now

Find excitement in your life and start exploring wherever you are right here, right now.

1068
mu bucket list

I was sitting at my cubicle, now that I am an adult, looking at the rain pouring down on the windowsill, bumming on life, wishing for the rain to just stop for a full day.

There are moments where we count down the hours until work is over and how many more days till the weekend, and this many weeks until something exciting. Or something like that? Well, I was bumming because my next day off from work is not until Memorial Day weekend, which is not until the end of May. And since this is my first year out of college being a “real person,” I am totally missing the winter, spring and summer breaks. I am sure all of us have felt this way even if just for a hot minute…

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

11 Ways To Survive Finals As Told By Leslie Knope

Because you know you're going to be stressed out, and Leslie knows exactly how to survive.

771
Everything hurts and I'm dying

So finals are on their way. That's right everybody, finals are about to start.

But hey, don't panic. Start getting your affairs in order and prepare for a week of hell. Here's a few things Leslie Knope wants you to do to make your finals week just a little bit less stressful:

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

10 Signs You Go To Kent State

You know you're a true Kent Stater when...

856
Kent State University
Great Value Colleges

If you go to or went to Kent State, then more than likely you have done or will do some of these things.

1. You’ve slipped and fallen on the ice at least once.

The winters at Kent are brutal, and while the heated sidewalks and some great snow boots are always a help, there’s no chance you won’t bust it on the ice at least once in your four plus years at school.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments