You got out of bed. You brushed your teeth. You held a conversation. You go to work on time. These are normal everyday things, right? Some of which are required to live a mature life beyond adolescence. What's the issue? The issue is that too many of my fellow millennials (18-33) want to be coddled and celebrated for every little thing while falsely clutching onto anxiety, depression, ADD, and PTSD.
I know what you're thinking, boo. "But Tate, these things are REALLY hard for some people!!!" and "Those are REAL issues that people struggle with!" That is beyond true. Very valid. Some people do suffer from agonizing depression and anxiety which causes them to experience normal daily activities as rather treacherous. There has been a noticeable spike in anxiety levels for millennials over the past decade, and some of this spike is reasonable. Then again, some of us only think we are experiencing these disorders and we aren't. Mental Illness these days is drenched in romance, self-diagnosis, and participatory trophy propaganda.
Mental Illness is Not Cool or Romantic...
We're romanticizing having a serious mental issue. That sounds crazy. It's now "cool" to be unable to carry out everyday activities. It's beautiful and mysterious to be suicidal and depressed. Deep rooted issues are not a trend! Talk to anyone battling mental illness and they probably wouldn't be jumping for joy to be doing so. The culture has shifted the language around these disorders to be rather poetic. It's cute and adorable and twistingly romantic to be extremely dependent/anxious/suffering. Illness is not an "in crowd" thing. Based on how millennials love to over-share (re: social media) you can probably bet this behavior is for attention. We want to feel unique yet part of the "crowd," but making mental illness seem romantic and chic is not the way to go. This only belittles how difficult these things truly can be for others.
(please stop using phrases like "beautifully tragic" when talking about depression, suicide, and the like)
Self-diagnosing is NOT a diagnosis.
The sad part about the romanticizing of mental illness is that it makes it difficult for those who genuinely suffer to be taken seriously. Anxiety is a naturally occurring emotion. While in college especially, anxiety is normal! We are saturated in temporary responsibility, lack of sleep, lack of exercise, poor eating, and peer pressure. Anyone would feel some sort of anxiety in those moments and it's okay! Your body will usually react that way. Does it mean you have a disorder? No. The National Institute of Mental Health gives a great explanation of the disorder here. Using the internet or friends to diagnose does not count for a diagnosis; seek a healthcare professional to truly figure out what's going on. Chances are you need to sleep, to eat healthier, cut that phone off, and alone time. It's worth mentioning that we aren't taking accountability for the situations we put ourselves in that cause us to feel incredibly stressed and anxious...like procrastination, hookup culture, and taking on too many responsibilities at one time. These things can make us feel overextended, anxious, and regretful. Self-care, not self-diagnosis!
Participatory Trophies
Everyone is truly unique. You are a winner in your own right. But, at some point, we need to be okay with not being externally congratulated for everything we do. Feeling sad when you aren't being praised doesn't necessarily make you depressed. It's deeper than that. Folks battling a mental illness need more than self-help sometimes! That's just how it is. For those of us who aren't dealing with that, you really need to lean on YOU. Affirm YOU. Be your own cheerleader! It's needed to have friends and family but they are human and they are not you: they will fail you sometimes. Rely on yourself and your faith if you practice one, these are things that don't fade or fail. If you feel you need some encouragement sometimes you have to do it for yourself. You have to be the realest one on your team. Find a little slice of confidence. If we throw every single person a party for everything they did, we will stifle their ability to be self-motivated. This will have you on Google thinking you've been plagued with a mental illness when perhaps you just need some good self-affirmation. Plus, healthy competition in the workplace, classroom, and on the team is good for you. It pushes you to be better than where you began. In short, when you know who you are and know your strengths, you will always feel like a #winner.
Stop the #Adulting Trend
Please, man. It's weird. This is what we're supposed to do! We're supposed to grow from kids to teens to adults. If you called your doctor on your own and paid your bills then GOOD. You should! Let's stop with the glamorization of being dependent... or a child. It's great that you're learning and growing, but making it a verb as if it is some special mysterious adventure just seems kind of...odd. You'll be doing this forever now so it's really not a temporary thrill. It's just life. You not wanting to do "adult" things could perhaps be more of a desire to nix your responsibilities than it is severe anxiety.
Long story short, don't glamorize. Mental illness is not: cute, fun, beautiful, mysterious, poetic, or sexy. It's a lifelong battle so don't dress it up. Those of us who are [unintentionally] trivializing out of fear, not every issue you have is attributed to a disorder. Step out of your comfort zone and work to overcome your fears. If you feel you truly have an issue then seek professional help. This life is an unpredictable rollercoaster, just hold on to the bars.
