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I'm The High School Girl Who Never Drinks Coffee, And I Still Never Sleep In Class

That powerful punch you get from a sip of morning coffee? I get that from my blaring alarm.

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I'm The High School Girl Who Never Drinks Coffee, And I Still Never Sleep In Class

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Coffee has the strangest taste to me, and it's as bitter as a taste can get. I know people use creamers and sugar to make it more than just plain beans and water, but even then, how do people drink this every morning? Even worse, how do people drink more than one cup a day? I've been hung up on this debate for years now, and even if I'll never have the answer, here's how I, an avid coffee avoider, stay awake every day regardless.


I set the loudest, most annoying alarms.

That powerful punch you get from a sip of coffee? I get that from the loving sound of my alarm blaring first thing in the morning. The sun still isn't up, there's a bird screaming right outside my window, and my lovely phone wants to remind me that there's another full day of work just calling my name. How's that for a pick-me-up?

I snooze the alarm until it's physically impossible to get ready on time.

You know what they say: the best way to be refreshed is to get as much sleep as possible. I bring a whole new name to the sleeping game because hitting the snooze button, especially after studying late the night before, is my specialty. Plus, who doesn't love having their sleep interrupted every five minutes by a nice, jarring sound?

I take power naps whenever possible.

I'm being serious here. If you have twenty minutes to spare, take a nap. Even ten minutes, take a nap. Five minutes, you might be stretching it, but try! Power naps are the powerful secret to catching up on important Zs you missed out on last night. In any case, coffee can't bring the incomprehensible joy of hitting the mattress once more!

I drink water.

Water might actually be my coffee. Someone out there might want to berate me about the fact that water is bland, unfriendly, and met with disappointment. But what does your coffee bring to the table? Beans. That's it. Beans and water and nothing more.

I get as much work done in my free time as possible.

Please, for crying out loud, don't expect to get enough sleep if you procrastinate on every assignment you're handed. That's something you can't justify at the end of the day, and even if your health comes first, work is still a priority. The best way to maintain your strongest immune system is to set time aside for work so that you can focus on your needs for the rest of the day.

I don't regularly rely on caffeine or energy drinks.

What a circular argument, Shreya! Of course, the key to not drinking coffee is to not drink coffee!

What I mean to say with this is that the best way to not be so dependent on coffee as a helping hand is to not normally drink it in the first place. Sure, I don't drink coffee because of how it tastes, but I don't mind the taste of energy drinks, which I also avoid. The point is that making the conscious decision to not even rely on caffeine for the occasional pick-me-up will save you a lot of trouble with waking up in the long run.

I wake up late enough so that I don't have time to make or grab coffee, even if I wanted to. 

No time? No problem! You'll be awakened anyway by the haunting feeling that you have that huge presentation in class today you don't want to be late for.

I wash my face with cold water whenever I get tired.

This at least works for me. Sometimes we just need to be like those women in face wash commercials and throw water all over our faces - that does the job! It's all about timing. If you know that your body feels tired at specific times each day, you'll know exactly when the next rude awakening is and will be mentally prepared.


And there you have it! Set down that cup of coffee, and splash some water on your face because you've got yourself a whole list of alternatives for that bitter bean water you call your best friend!

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