I don't do new year's resolutions. Never really have. I think maybe when I was a kid I'd throw a few nebulous goals out there but never really meant anything behind it, and certainly didn't commit to them. I understand the idea of using the new year to symbolically wipe the slate clean and such, I just don't jive with it. I'm living the mental illness struggle life of one day at a time. It is by no means exclusive to just mental illness, loads of people live one day at at time. Considering the world and times we live in, there isn’t a choice for a lot of people to plan beyond surviving. There is a lot of uncertainty and instability around the world at any given era but I think this one is off the rails.

Now, just because I don't participate in new year resolutions doesn't mean I think resolutions are silly. People make resolutions all the time, on any old day. I definitely enjoy the flexibility of making your own timetable. The idea that you can better yourself at a set date and until then hang loose seems strange to me. Tomorrow is not promised and awareness isn't activated by the passage of time, it has to sought, found, received and engaged with.

There are as many ways to better yourself as there are self help books, although they aren't necessarily related. It really depends on what your personal praxis is. For me, it's pro intersectionality feminism and that comes with a side of constantly examining yourself and societal schisms. So, that's part of the reason why I don't participate in symbolic promises to myself. Before feminism and even still, is the terrifying concept of promising myself anything and breaking said promise. That shit is devastating for me. I just don't dig promises because humans are fickle and everything else is just as unpredictable. Efforts and action are more my style.

Speaking of efforts, one I won't be bothering investing labor into is weight. Like, weight loss, diet the whole self hate schtick. I spent too much of my precious mental health destroying my body rather than doing anything loving for it. Fuck that. I'm gonna keep eating pizza. I'm going to keep eating when i'm hungry. I'm gonna keep eating, period. And if someone tries to get in my face concern trolling I'm gonna eat them with fries on the side. In fact, anyone body shaming or fat shaming will be smothered in hot sauce and eaten like a 7-11 taquito. It won't be an enjoyable experience but it will be satisfying to watch disappear. That's not a resolution, by the way. It's a warning.

I love the ‘leave it in 2016’ meme and intent behind it. I wish it worked just like that, an enchanted veil that screens for stupidity. Unfortunately gonna be a lot of the same old shit, different day. A lot of keeping on keeping on, or trucking or marching. I wish there was a more tangible magic to the new year, one that would fill my friends and comrades with all the strengths, a refresh of the compassion wells in our hearts give us a soothing balm to our minds. Closest we get is incredibly inebriated, which isn't quite the same at all. So bring it on 2017, I know what you really about and if I need to, I'll cover it in cheese and eat it.