“Don’t deselect yourself.” That phrase was uttered by one of my professors my sophomore year and it has become the best piece of advice I’ve ever received and a life motto. It’s so easy to get down on ourselves, compare ourselves, and ultimately give up on our goals. We want to maybe go for a job but we think we’re not qualified enough. We want a scholarship but we don’t apply because “what if we don’t get it?” We want to travel but we let our fears tie us down.
It’s so easy to think about all the negative outcomes that many times we don’t stop to think about the positive. We deny ourselves chances and opportunities because we let our fear and self-doubt get the better of us. I’ve said this phrase to a few friends when they begin to doubt themselves and I’ve used it on myself a few times.
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It’s almost a philosophy of “just go for it, the worst that could happen is they say no.” Yes, rejection is hard, but it’s harder to wonder what would’ve happened had we gone for it. For example, I was (admittedly) nervous about studying abroad, I was thinking I wouldn’t get in or it wouldn’t change anything for me. Still, I decided to apply and had one of the most amazing, life changing experiences.
Likewise, I struggle with making friends because I think I’m too awkward or weird and that people won’t like me. Yet, I’ve decided that I can approach people, I can make the first move, I can ask people to hang out because hearing “no” will still be better than a what if and by not “deselecting” myself, I’ve gained some great friends and experiences.
It seems like a simple thing to do but it’s harder in practice. We might want to go for a non-traditional career yet we let doubt creep in and we think we’re not talented enough. We think our life experience won’t amount to work experience so we deselect ourselves from a work opportunity. We think our grades aren’t good enough so we don’t apply to that school we really want to.
Life is full of rejections and what ifs but never allow yourself to be the person that gets in your way. Even when you face rejection, don’t be scared to try again, to think outside the box, and give yourself a chance. You are absolutely worth it and the work you put in and the things that shape your life will lead you to great things if only you remember to never deselect yourself.
