One of my favorite quotes that constantly lived in my mind the past few years is, "I can't go back to yesterday because I was a different person then." I find so much truth in those words because realistically, yesterday was the past, and unfortunately, everyone is flawed. We can't just change yesterday. We have to move on and grow for today.
"I'm not the same soul I once was. A lot has changed, A lot had to change. So you shouldn't expect out of me what I embodied in the past. For that part of me no longer exist."
There are not many things in my life that I am not noticeably proud of, but the opportunity to grow and reroute my whole life and become a better human being is practically top tier.
As you grow and develop and face many uncertainties, the situations you walk through change you to become better for yourself.
I can't sit here and say that every change was intentional because a majority of the changes came when I least expected to change, but some of them came from knowing that my self image of who I was wasn't who I wanted to be.
Fortunately, it wasn't just my image that changed, my mental mindset about life, about work ethics, becoming an adult, doing things for myself, living life to the fullest and paving a path to happiness when I thought it was nearly impossible to do so all changed.
If you knew me years ago, I would make up the silliest, most illogical and ridiculous excuses to either not go to work or actively attend school. Years ago, I didn't know the meaning of having to work for the things you want in life and would constantly use my parents as a walking bank.
Years ago, I didn't recognize that life is only temporary and what you have might be what is gone tomorrow.
As life progressed, so did I. Today, I am actively working three jobs, working seven days a week clocking in at around 55 hours per week. I am 'adulting' in the aspect that nothing in life comes free, and everything is money.
I have bought myself things that I could never dream of actually purchasing by myself. Today, I am living life to the fullest because unfortunately, it only comes around once, and you won't ever get the present day back again.
You learn through the years to not feed into the pointless drama and that you can keep your opinion silent. You learn who your true friends are, and you get rid of the toxic ones.
You learn that if they're not bringing positivity and happiness you don't need them in your life, and you learn that what you went through in life really is responsible for shaping you.
Today, I love a little harder, I have bigger goals and aspirations, I let go of toxic energy, I let what flows flow and what doesn't flow, I let go. I am happier, I have seen more of life versus the same old hometown. I found myself, and I became self confident.
Most importantly, I am not the girl who use to be weak, not lively and irresponsible.
I'm not the same book I used to be, pictures and details changed. I'm on a whole new book of my life with many different pictures and details, and if the summary of my life doesn't excite you, feel free to not open the book, because at the end of the day, it won't hurt my feelings.
"I am just not the same person, three years ago or yesterday. The change happens so gradually that we hardly notice. But love, pain and knowledge constantly change us. That is the way it has always been. Just be aware of it, and let yourself blossom into something beautiful."