Why I Believe That Donald Trump is a Kindergartener | The Odyssey Online
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Politics and Activism

Why I Believe That Donald Trump is a Kindergartener

Trump: *kicks dirt and stomps off towards Twitter*

19
Why I Believe That Donald Trump is a Kindergartener
newsweek

We all know that Donald Trump is man who likes to speak his mind. He has a longstanding reputation of saying whatever he wants, whenever he wants. His Twitter account, for example, is riddled with tweets covering every topic imaginable: from praising Kanye to bashing Hillary to not-so-much bashing Hillary to whining about Alec Baldwin on SNL. We never have to wonder what the President Elect is thinking, because it's painted upon any surface of the internet for any one to see. The only drawback to having access to Trump's public monologue is witnessing first-hand the glaringly obvious conclusion: Our President Elect is a kindergartener. I've taken the liberty and gathered quite a significant sized handful of evidence to support my theory, so I'll just leave them here.

    Exhibit A: How Trump Reacts to Real Problems

    1. China seizes a US Naval Underwater Drone
    We should tell China that we don't want the drone they stole back.- let them keep it!
    — Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 18, 2016 (view here)

    Ok, first off to quote Aberforth in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part II:

    "THAT'S A BOY'S ANSWER!" - Aberforth

    Actually, that's it. That's all I can say, because this sounds like China just stole America's lunch and all Trump can come up with is to scream: "Oh yeah?! Well, your face is stupid!"

    2. Russia Interferes in Election

    Trump's team releases the following statement:

    "These are the same people who said Saddam Hussein had weapons of mass destruction. The election was over a long time ago in one of the biggest Electoral College victories in history. It's now time to move on and 'Make America Great Again.'" (view here)

    Not only does he not remain loyal to our country and our OWN agency, but he gets his facts wrong. This future presidential team looks like a group of playground bullies right before the nerds revolt and start to tear apart every wrong thing they assert about their position. Let me begin that process with these statistics about past Electoral College margins in previous elections shown below. Also, the election was not "a long time ago," Donald. I know you're overwhelmed and it seems like your presidential status is time-crawling like a bad nap, but pull it together. I don't know how you plan to "Make America Great Again" if you're going to pit the American people against their own Intelligence Agency.

    Exhibit B: Trump Complains about Celebrity Impersonations instead of Worrying about Being President.

    1. Baldwin Dons the Trump Persona on SNL again.

    I mean Alec Baldwin shut down his whining pretty handily, but that doesn't stop Trump from complaining to his metaphorical teacher.

    2. Oh look, it wasn't the first time.

    I mean it's just embarrassing. Like, I can't even look anymore.


    I could go on and on about why I believe that Trump deserves a regulated snack time and a time out corner when he insults American people, but I will let you see for yourself. The aforementioned tweets and events, were among the list of many including, bashing the Hamilton cast for their calm and intelligent appeal to Mike Pence- who by the way willingly walked into one of the most diverse and well-rounded casts on Broadway performing a musical about American politics. I meannnnnnnnnn, what did you think was gonna happen Mikey?

    If I was to accurately list every piece of support for my kindergarten theory, then this article would be the length of the original NASA computer logs. So instead, here's a link to Trump's Twitter: @realDonaldTrump. It has everything you'll ever need to witness Trump's playground in full effect.


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