Donald Trump or My Drunk Uncle? | The Odyssey Online
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Politics

Donald Trump or My Drunk Uncle?

How well do you know The Donald? Or is he just a My Drunk Uncle in disguise?

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Donald Trump or My Drunk Uncle?
Donald Trump & Drunk Uncle From 'Saturday Night Live' Are Basically The Same Person

With the presidential election coming up it’s important to really KNOW the candidate you are voting for. One of the most talked about, media covered and controversial candidates – as we all know – is Donald Trump. In my opinion, this man has been wrongly compared to a millionaire hill Billy, Hitler and a spray tanned raisin. Yet these comparisons are inaccurate in every way. Taking into consideration the prestige surrounding Donald Trump, the most accurate thing to compare this great, future commander in chief to is… my drunk uncle. Now when I say, my drunk uncle, I don’t literally mean one of my uncles. I mean that when you think of a drunk uncle, blurting out the first thing that pops into his impaired mind, a lot of Trump tendencies align with the “drunk uncle” stereotype. So in the interest of testing our own knowledge of the republican party’s talking head himself, I have designed a quick quiz. Below are 12 quotes. It is up to you to figure out which ones were said by my drunk uncle, and which ones are said by the potential president of the United States of America!


1. “Look at that face! Would anyone vote for that? Can you imagine that, the face of our next president?! I mean, [she’s] a woman, and I'm not supposed to say bad things, but really, folks, come on. Are we serious?"

2. “You know, it really doesn’t matter what they write as long as you’ve got a young and beautiful piece of ass.”

3. “We’re losing a lot of people because of the Internet. We have to see Bill Gates and a lot of different people who really understand what’s happening and maybe, in some ways, closing that Internet up in some ways."

4. “All of the women on The Apprentice flirted with me – consciously or unconsciously. That’s to be expected.”

5. “I have never seen a thin person drinking Diet Coke.”

6. “I was down there, and I watched our police and our firemen, down on 7-Eleven, down at the World Trade Center, right after it came down”

7. “The point is, you can never be too greedy.”

8. “My IQ is one of the highest — and you all know it! Please don’t feel so stupid or insecure; it’s not your fault.”

9. “You know I’m automatically attracted to beautiful — I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait.”

10. “Number one, I have great respect for women. I was the one that really broke the glass ceiling on behalf of women, more than anybody in the construction industry.”

11. "I think Bush is probably the worst President in the history of the United States."

12. “And when you’re a star, they let you do it... You can do anything. Grab them by the p---y, you can do anything.”


I’ll be the first to admit, some of those quotes were very obviously from the mouth and mind of the Donald. But some were a bit trickier than others. Unfortunately, the most absurd quotes are the ones we are all familiar with, and were straight from our potential president. Actually, ALL the quotes are from Donald Trump. Every single one. No president should have quotes like these, and so many more, following him. Our president is the FACE of our country. His baggage is our baggage. His dirt is our dirt. Because the president is the most prevalent figure our nation has, to other countries, his opinions reflect the opinions of the country in its entirety. Do you really want to be defined by these disgusting quotes? Would you want to be known as a misogynistic, self-absorbed, troll doll hair having, circular talking halfwit? If you wouldn’t want that for your own image, why would you accept it for our Commander in Chief? Our one and only President?

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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