It is the prime theme of most Lifetime movies, the tragic ending to this on the news late last night, the stories you hear from friends of friends. But the mere thought of it happening to you or a family member doesn't seem realistic, right?
One in every four women will experience domestic violence in her lifetime. For all those confused here is a clear definition of domestic abuse:
Domestic abuse is a pattern of behavior used to establish power and control over another person through fear and intimidation, often including the threat or use of violence.
So, it's not solely based on violence, verbal abuse does qualify as domestic abuse. There's no sugar coating this kind of topic. Abuse is abuse -- verbal and/or physical. It's wrong.
This topic brings my stomach into a knot and makes it hard for me to choke back tears. The importance of being aware of domestic violence is life or death for some. With awareness of its dangers and what you can do for someone in need of help, we can stop this. We can save lives. We can be the voices for those silenced by an abusive partner. Without this, we risk losing the ones we love.
Verbal abuse is hurtful and usually attacks the nature and abilities of the partner. Over time, the partner may begin to believe that there is something wrong with her or her abilities. She may come to feel that she is the problem, rather than her partner.
Verbal abuse is manipulative and controlling. Even disparaging comments may be voiced in an extremely sincere and concerned way. But the goal is to control and manipulate.
Domestic violence is a violent confrontation between family or household members involving physical harm, sexual assault or fear of physical harm. Family or household members include spouses / former spouses, those in (or formerly in) a dating relationship, adults related by blood or marriage and those who have a biological or legal parent-child relationship.
Helping someone in an abusive relationship can be extremely tough so it's essential to be careful with how and when you talk/help the person. Most victims convince themselves over time that the abuse is their own fault. This makes it extremely tough to help that person because their perspective on the situation has been altered by the abuser. Another way it can be tough is because abusers use their power to threaten the lives of the ones the victim loves, kill them and threaten almost anything to make the victim fear leaving more than the abuse itself.
We cannot simply 'rescue' those in these situations. But, we can take critical steps to pushing them to take back control of their life.
1-800-799-SAFE (7233) can get you a referral to a local program near you that provides counseling or support groups for domestic violence.
ASPIRE is an app made by the When Georgia Smiled: Robin McGraw Foundation. It's a free app that displays recent news in sports / entertainment as a camouflage, but under a help, section offers a way for those in trouble to get outside help. By tapping three times on the screen while in the app it will send emergency texts to your list of contacts in the app. This app saves women's lives and I highly recommend that everyone use it.