I remember sitting around our conductor on the floor of the stage at Spivey Hall, confused and disappointed that our tour to North Carolina had been cancelled. She took a long pause before she told us why.
I remember frustrating rehearsals with songs we just couldn't get right, trying over and over again until everyone wanted to quit.
I remember working through what every song from our set meant to me and being able to rehearse with a completely different perspective after that. Once I got to rehearsal, I (or all of us) would end up singing certain songs with tear filled eyes as the beauty of the sounds and the texts carried through the hall perfectly.
I remember the calendar flying by and the clock ticking away, every new day and week and month meaning we were one step closer.
Then the weeks really started to fly by, and before we knew it, it was summer, and it was almost time to go.
I remember being there, and that what we were doing hit me when we saw the blown up concert posters from when the Beatles performed on that same stage.
Where did we go, you ask? Where we went has everything to do with why I remember the year of preparation so vividly. We went to Carnegie Hall.
When I say we, I mean the Spivey Hall Children's Choir. You can imagine the excitement of a children's choir (really middle/high school age students) when they discover news like this. Our sad reactions to a cancelled North Carolina summer tour were met with an explosion of screams, laughter, and even some tears. Then we found out that we were not simply going to Carnegie Hall as many do, with a larger group or a conductor they don't know. It was just us who were going. It was our solo debut. The stage was ours. We picked the songs, our director got to be there with us through all of it.
Singing in Carnegie Hall is something I didn't know how to prepare for. Thankfully, Dr. Shaw had been there just last year, so she was able to give us perspective before we went. Still, it wasn't quite what I thought it would be when I walked on stage for the first time. The room is huge. The seating in the balcony seems to just go on for forever. The colors are vivid and beautiful; luscious red and gold, everywhere. We looked like ants on that huge stage, and felt like it too.
Aside from the aesthetics, being on stage was a thrill in and of itself. As mentioned above, I stood on that stage, knowing that the Beatles had been there. Not just the Beatles, but countless others; Johnny Cash, Yo-Yo Ma, Frank Sinatra, Bob Dylan, and Led Zeppelin being just a few. What they did, and the names they made for themselves, doesn't resemble my life remotely..but just knowing they were there once, and then there I was... what a thrilling feeling.
It was the most professional environment I've ever worked under, everything is held to a strict schedule, with precise instructions for everything. But that's necessary for such an admirable and established institution.
Carnegie Hall is not something I will soon forget. It was truly the experience of a lifetime...something I wouldn't have wanted to experience with any people other than who I was on stage with. Making music with people whose hearts beat for the same songs and the same desire to touch the audience makes the process indescribably better. We were able to sing with a common understanding that what we were doing mattered. We will never be among the big names of noteworthy Carnegie Hall performers...but we will always hope, pray, and believe that we will remain in the hearts of the audience that sat there on that day. We believe that the songs we sang were exactly the songs they needed to hear- that we weren't just vessels of beautiful music, but of truth that needed to permeate their hearts.
Carnegie Hall is more than just a fancy building. It will remain in my memory a place where music binds people together and inspires them in whatever way they may need it to.