A lot of us have pets. Whether they be dogs, cats, turtles or fish, they are a huge part of our lives and part of our family. All my family are such dog persons we have quite a lot of dogs back home. Since I was a baby, I was always surrounded by dogs. Whenever I come back home for breaks, tens of my dogs would come running at me and I would just sit down right there so they can lick my face and be all excited.

Each and every one of them is so special. Bong Bong always smiles with her teeth out and just knits her brows. Angela is so smart and truly motherly she had never forgotten to take care of her son, Matthew, who had epilepsy. Matthew's epilepsy was so bad that it affected his brain so we couldn't even touch him and he peed anywhere. Even when Matthew was 3 years old and all grown up, Angela would still make sure to lick off his down department to clean him up, make sure that he eats, make sure that he was getting alone with other dogs. Until the day we had to put Matthew down because he was in so much pain, Angela never forgot to take care of her son, just like humans, like us. Like this, all of them have their own character and always stay by my side, brightening my days.

Today, one of dogs died. I've had so many of my dogs leave me to go to a better place, but I could never get used to it. She was such a tiny little fluff ball when she was a baby. As she grew up, we realized that she suffered from a lot of conditions. She was infertile; her spine was bent; her digestive system was messed up; she was blind; she lost most of her teeth. All these. Yet, she was only 5 years old. We thought she was not going to make it and die when she was 2-3 years old. Honestly, she was a ugly dog. But to our family, she was such a sweet baby. She couldn't properly walk or run so she would wobble her way through to get to us and sit by our feet. We would pick her up and put her on the couch, and she would just quietly sit next to us. Whenever I cried, she would just come check on me and sit next to me, trying to lick my tears off my face. Whenever we took her out for a walk, she would try her best to run like other dogs and wobble around.

Today, my mum left me a text message that she left us, and went to a better place. I never got to spend that much time with her because I've been away from home since I was 14. But it still hit me hard. I don't know what to feel. I just keep thinking that I should've been better to her, that I should've given her more love, that I should've hugged her more, that I should've appreciated her more. It's just this regret left in me. I know I'll get over it one day and see her again. But for now, I don't know what to feel.