I live in constant fear of a lot of things. The usual are failing, not being able to please everyone, not being loved, and my loved ones leaving me, but sometimes they are things that I have never even thought of before. Sometimes things randomly pop into my mind and I will spend weeks obsessing over this one idea.
The one thing really weird about all of this, though, is that I am also extremely free-spirited. I am a goal setter and a go-getter. I have really great dreams, and I am determined to meet all of them. I have spent a lot of time “ripping the Band-Aid off” in a sense. In almost everything I do I have to jump.
Many people have asked me “How are you going to be a journalist with all of this fear of not being able to please people?” Honestly, I ask myself that too, but I truly believe that I am supposed to be on this path, and so I will build my confidence every step of the way. Even posting on this media outlet is a step in the right direction. Getting myself to share my writing has been a process for about two years now, but like I said before you just have to rip the Band-aid off sometimes. In some cases, I have gotten some negative feedback about my writing, but I have also gotten amazing responses and advice. The positives always end up outweighing the negatives, but you are the one that has to have that outlook on the situation.
A lot of meditation and self-work has gone into making myself less fearful. I still am definitely growing and learning to this day. It has hindered relationships, caused me not to take certain risks, and in the past it has caused me to not be my true authentic self. I feel bad about these situations, but at this point all I can do is move forward. I can only move on and that is what I plan to do.
A lot of other people live in constant fear whether it is the same things I listed or other things. Most people do not even know they are so fearful, and they are always questioning why these certain things keep hindering opportunities in their lives.
What I suggest is that you take a step back and ask yourself some questions, “Why am I unable to take this opportunity? Why can’t I be in a relationship? Why can’t I just be my authentic self?" Really dig deep into your problems and maybe meditate on it, journal it, or whatever would be best for you. Being able to step back and take a look at yourself is a very hard but important thing to do. Sometimes we do not realize that we are the ones truly holding ourselves back.
Being able to clear out these negative things that are holding you back is the best thing you can do for your fear. You will begin to find that certain things will come easier to you, and maybe even your energy as a person will shift.