High school was a learning experience. Most of us can agree, and even laugh about it now. I'm not typically one who believes in changing things that happened in my past. I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason, and God shapes each of us uniquely through it.
However, if I could go back in time and do it all over again or maybe even change one fifteen year old girl's mind about the next four years of high school, I would. Here's some of the many things I learned, that maybe another can find useful at the innocent age of fifteen.
1. Your first love shouldn't be a boy, it should be yourself.
I can't stress this to you enough. I know how great it feels to be praised and cherished by another, but a silly boy will not know how to treat you if you do not know how to treat yourself. Yes, a boy may treat you like dirt at some point, but when you learn to love yourself the right boy will treat you like a princess.
2. Time can heal most anything.
L O L... I cannot stress this to you enough. Don't make ultimatums, don't say you'll never speak again, and don't attempt to permanently burn bridges. Although something may hurt deeply right now, it will not matter two years from now. The hurt goes away, and life goes on.
3. Extend grace when you witness others fall short.
Sweet girl, never put yourself in another's shoes. You will learn over time that you will never understand the full circumstances of another's situation. You'll never understand why people do what they do. However, you also don't know what will happen to you down the road. We are all humans, and we all fall short and mess up sometimes. No one is perfect. Extend the grace and mercy that you would want someone to do for you when you mess up.
4. Mom is always right. Like, seriously.
HA...HA...HA. When you decide to purchase a ticket for the Mega Millions Lottery, or Fantasy Five, get her to choose your numbers. I don't know how they do it, and sometimes I don't even WANT to know how they do it... BUT MAMA IS ALWAYS RIGHT. TRUST HER. It's like they have a cheat sheet or something, totally not fair. It's pretty spooky.
5. Your past does not determine your worth.
Life can be a tough crowd, but you don't have to partake in it. Someone else may define you for what you have done previously, but that does not mean you have to, sweetheart. Each day is a new day to start over. We are forgiven by Jesus Christ, who died on the cross for us. Don't worry about fixing yourself or proving you're different now from your past because here's the sweet truth: JESUS HAS ALREADY TAKEN CARE OF ALL OF IT.
6. Never expect someone else to complete you.
I can't stress this one enough. You will never be fully happy until you are happy alone. In today's society, relationships and marriages are idolized. Instead of using it the way it was intended (to help support another in their walk with Christ), it's being commercialized into this unrealistic thing that you only see in the movies. The truth is the only one who can fully complete and satisfy you is God. A boy, or a best friend, can perhaps fulfill you for awhile, but humans were not meant to satisfy each other. We aren't enough; we need God. Putting that kind of pressure on another to enhance your happiness is unrealistic and also unfair to him and to you.
7. It's never too late to start over.
Do you want to do something different with your life than you originally planned? Go for it. Be a doctor; be a teacher; be a great friend. It's never too late to start a clean slate!
8. Genuineness, kindness, and loyalty are sexy. Forget looks, and all of the other crap.
Sweetheart, I know you want to have a rocking beach bod, or pretty long hair. But I guarantee you that three years from now people will appreciate your kindness more than your looks. Even though at the time I didn't appreciate them for their true worth, those people who were kind in high school now mean so much more to me.
9. The realest moments of your life are the times you think you are about to break.
I know you don't think anyone else knows how you're feeling right now, but we all do. We have all had something occur that we didn't think we would ever move past, but time does go on. God gives us trials in life in order for us to grow. Rejoice in your suffering because that means something in your life needed to change and God is working through it for your better good. I thought I would never live through heartbreaks, mean girls, or severe clinical depression. I can tell you now that every single one of those events helped strengthen not only my relationship with God, but also with myself.
10. When Daddy says "You can do anything you set your mind on," he's not bluffing.
As long as you set your mind on doing something, you've got it. My Dad use to always tell me this growing up, and I thought he was only saying this because he had to. Boy, was I wrong. As long as you want something, you can find a way. My Dad showed me this when he opened his own automotive shop at seventeen with the help of his Father. He had so many things going against him, that I'm sure made it exceedingly hard. However he busted his tail every day from 8-5. Now over thirty years later, he has one of the most successful shops in Milledgeville. If you want something enough, you can do it. Remember that hard work isn't suppose to be easy though.
11. Get. In. The. Habit. Of. Waking. Up. Early. PLEASE... These 8 am's are killing me.
You would be saving me lots of grief. Also, start acquiring a taste for coffee if you can. I still don't like it.
12. Family comes first. They are your biggest fans, don't forget to be theirs too.
You are going to waste so many years chasing after the approval of the wrong ones. Silly insignificant boys, temporary friends, and popular girls. It's heartbreaking to think how many weekends I wasted that I could have spent with my awesome aunt, my gorgeous sisters, my wonderful strong mother, my loyal little brother, my inspirational father, my caring step-mother, or my unconditional loving grandparents. The thing is: they understand you and love you despite all of that. Cherish them. Be their number one fans, and make up for the time lost. They will always be there for you, and that's not something to take for granted.
13. Innocence is beautiful to the right person. Don't be embarrassed about it.
Don't pretend to be someone you're not. Don't feel like you have to drink, or dress a certain way to be taken seriously. Don't feel bad if you are unexperienced. In high school, some people may tease you for it.. but in College. HA. It makes you a gem! You will be respected so much more for it. Fight the pressure, don't do anything you're not comfortable doing.
14. Start watching Grey's Anatomy now. Seriously, it's going to take you years to catch up.
Six months later.... I am only on season 10. My roommates lock me in my room every Thursday night while they watch new episodes.
15. Just because others consider something "lame" doesn't mean you should too.
Play piano, sing, read books... if you like it, go for it! I don't know why we focused so much on what others though about us in high school. Seriously, it's so petty. BE WHO YOU WANT TO BE, NOT WHAT OTHERS WOULD LIKE YOU TO.
16. Also, it's okay to stay in on a Friday night and it's okay to say no to plans. Take a break!
You're not lame. Truth is, my favorite thing to do now is sit at home and watch Gilmore Girls with my mom. Guys, I'm only twenty and sometimes I feel like a sixty year old woman, but it's fine. Everyone needs a break at some point. Treat Yo Self.
17. You can't do it, but God can.
God will never give you more than you can handle. This tip is going to take years to understand and that's okay. Truth is, I still struggle believing this now. YET EVERY TIME there is something I think is impossible, God laughs and takes care of it. You aren't always going to be able to do something, that's why you need to learn to trust in Him. It's okay to get help.
