Let me start off by saying that yes, one day I do hope to have a family of my own one day. But at the same time, some people act like if women don't start having children right away then somehow we will cease to exist in this overpopulated world; they act as if me not having children as soon as humanly possible somehow affects them and their daily lives.
Trust me, I have the Pinterest board full of ideas for when I have a baby. I even have a few baby names picked out if the day ever comes around. My baby fever makes me frustrated. I know that I am more fertile now then I will be later on in life, you don't have to tell me, Edna, but if at all possible I am going to do it on my own time when I am ready.
I want to have children the best way I know possible and to put it simply, that means to have my s*** together. I want to be as stable as possible when I decide to bring children into this world because I know from watching many people I know have children that it is far from easy.
I grew up where my sister and I were born less than two years apart, both unexpectedly. My parents did their best to provide and keep their nose above water. Overall, they weren't financially prepared for one kid, much less two. We were always fine and never went without the necessities, but I always hated seeing my parents feel bad for our financial situation.
While I know my parents always did their best, growing up not always having money for simple things like school photos or even nice clothes made not only myself, but my sister, determined not to have that problem in our adult lives. We also hoped that maybe one day we could take care of our parents because despite the obstacles they faced, they always took care of my sister and me.
I have come to know all too well that we have to be able to take care of ourselves first before we can take care of another human being. I've been asked about children since I was 19. Yes, 19-years-old, still living at home, in no hurry to get a boyfriend, just trying to graduate college and figure out this whole "adult" thing.
I know that I don't get as much crap as women who don't want children at all; I guess more than anything I'm being rushed to have children as soon as possible, but it all stems from the same misogynistic mindset: that women are put on this earth to make babies.
I have one response for Barbra or Billy Bob who think that we still live in the 1950's: this world is overpopulated, anyone who chooses not to have children are not harming anything or anyone, especially you as an individual for that matter. If anything, we need to start adopting children who were put on this earth, yet don't have homes.
I understand that sometimes we do have kids unplanned, but contraceptives are available more than ever before. The reason for this is so we can choose when or when not to have children. It's so important to raise children in the best circumstances possible, and that means bringing them into the world when we're prepared to do so and not making them go without if at all possible.
