Being a perfectionist, we set the bar high for ourselves and we always put our best foot forwards with anything we do to achieve it. We dedicate an abundance amount of attention and time to our work to maintain our high personal standards that we set for ourselves. Things with a perfectionist are either black or white. There is hardly any in-between when it comes to a perfectionist life. It is either right or wrong, good or bad, and success or failure. It should seem that being a perfectionist it should lead you to perfection in everything, but most often than not the opposite happens.
Perfectionists have trouble being in romantic relationships. The expectations and demands are extremely high, leading to their partners to feel inadequate and pressured. Being in a romantic relationship, perfectionists more often than not feel disappointed, angry and resentful. If perfectionism is carried to far, it can cause harm to a person's self-esteem and lead to many downfalls in relationships. Although in friendships, they will always go out of their way to be supportive and courteous. Nonetheless, they can also be very competitive.
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The continuous anxiety about what needs to be accomplished at the "perfect moment" causes more stress than needed. This being the most simple task can be blown way out of portion to the extent of becoming subconsciously intimidating to achieve. Unfortunately, the way a perfectionist responds to anxiety is to work hard and try to accomplish more and more. Lingering on to projects that are already finished, trying to find new ways to improve it. Which ultimately can ruin things with the little add-ons we might make to it. With all of this anxiety for that "perfect moment", it leave perfectionists to become exhausted and miserable sometimes.
In the core of being a perfectionist we tend to believe that we are not good enough or special the way we are. We believe that our values comes from the achievements and service in the aspects of our lives. Most perfectionists are running on a never-ending treadmill of external achievements that only brings you joy for a little while. The key points in a perfectionist life grows from the points of feeling imperfect, deeply flawed, and unlovable.
If you are a perfectionist, just remember a few key factors. True internal acceptance and peace does not come from changing what is outside of you. Pay attention to the good things instead of magnifying the negative ones, especially anticipating problems that are unlikely to happen. Create realistic goals and expectations and allow yourself to mess up on purpose. Play it all out and ask yourself " What's the worst thing that can happen?" Embrace your uniqueness, love yourself including your imperfections, and think of mistakes as lessons.
