Ladies, Stop Trying To Teach Boys How To Be A Man. | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
relationships

Ladies, Stop Trying To Teach Boys How To Be Your Man If They're Not Even Men In The First Place

It is your job to love him. But it is not your job to teach him how to love you back.

1799
Ladies, Stop Trying To Teach Boys How To Be Your Man If They're Not Even Men In The First Place
Jennifer Casto

I see. this way too often, honestly it upsets me and breaks my heart. It breaks my heart when I see a girl begging her boyfriend to put her on her Snapchat story. It breaks my heart when I see a girl begging her boyfriend to get off a video game and spend time with her. It breaks my heart when I see a girl doodling on a napkin at the dinner table and her boyfriend is on his phone and hasn't even looked up at her once. These things break my heart because this girl, whoever she may be, maybe it is you? She deserves a man. What she has though, is a boy. And before you say anything, yes, there is a huge difference.

I was that girl once. I begged and begged my ex-boyfriend all the time to put me on his Snapchat story. You may be reading this and be thinking "Wow she's a little attention seeking." No, that is not it at all. A simple act of being posted about made me feel special, loved, missed at times, and served as reassurance and a word of affirmation for me. Do you want to know something silly? Maybe you've done it too. Sometimes I would do something crazy to get his attention. Something funny, and silly and random just so he would post me on his story and I wouldn't have to ask.

At the dinner table, I was that girl that while he was on his phone I was sliding him notes on a napkin saying "I love you" or "Hi" or funny jokes to get his full and undivided attention.

At home, I was the girl that used to literally throw myself at him while he was playing video games to try and get him to press pause for two minutes and pay attention to me and have a conversation with me.

You see, I was that girl. But I refuse to ever be that girl again. If you are that girl, stop what you're doing.

It is your job to love him. But it is not your job to teach him how to love you back.

There is a big difference between a boy and a man. Contrary to what society may believe most boys don't actually turn into men until they are almost 40. Scary for us girls right? But here's the kicker and to be honest it has nothing to do with age.

Any boy that is in the process of becoming a man and maturing is going to know how to treat a woman. He is not going to choose video games or his phone over you. He is going to post you everywhere all the time because he wants to show you off to the world and make you feel special. He isn't going to ever leave you wondering.

The list could really go on comparing and contrasting the differences between a boy and a man but the important ones to remember when you are in a relationship are:

1. A boy thinks "me." A man thinks "us"

2. A boy gives false promises. A man honors his commitments (one being you.)

3. A boy cares about how you look in jeans. A man cares about how you look in his future.

4. You will always wonder how a boy feels about you. You will always know how a man feels about you.

All too often I see girls in the act of this. It is almost like they are training a dog or raising a child. They order them around and become demanding when it comes to doing things that make them feel special, validated and reassured. Granted, they are doing this because their relationship is lacking something but the truth is, it shouldn't be lacking something in the first place.

You are dating a boy not a man. I hate to break that to you. I really do. It's the hardest news you'll ever receive. Why? Well because

You can't fix him, you can't teach him, and you can't change a boy into a man. They have to do it on their own

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Honorary Roommate
Rachel Zadeits

For some of us, coming to college was the first time we ever had to share a room. It was a big change, but a fun one. As you meet more and more people over the course of your college career, it seems to be a pattern that you will at some point have that one friend that doesn't live with you, but acts like they do. We call those people, "Honorary Roommates" and here are 11 signs you have one in your life.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

10 Reasons Why It's Awesome When Your Best Friend Gets New Friends

She may not be with you 24/7 but it's all good because you're soul sisters.

670
super friends
Gabi Morales

We all have a person, and when that person makes some new friends, we tend to forget all the great things that can come out of it. Never forget how special they are to you and why you are best friends.

Keep Reading...Show less
mountains

If you're like me, then the last semester kicked your butt, big time. Lots of papers, projects, and overall chaos. While some things are beyond our control, there are some things you can do to make this semester one of your best ones yet!

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

8 Cringey College Tinder Stories

. Cringey Tinder stories from some Tinder girls

2711
a man and a woman sitting at a table
Photo by Good Faces on Unsplash

Toilet Troubles

"So, usually I would never go on a Tinder date but when you are out with girlfriends and a hot Bosnian guy says he wants to hang with you and his friends, you oblige. We head to their apartment and when I realized I may pee my pants if I don't find a bathroom soon. I ask for the bathroom and a friend of my tinder date shows me to it and said in all seriousness that I was not allowed to flush the toilet under ANY circumstances. Having a few drinks--or five--I relieved myself to, nevertheless, flush the toilet. Within seconds, his bathroom was flooded and towels were laid out everywhere to catch the toilet water. To say the least, we were not invited back"

Keep Reading...Show less
Girl with a Guy Bestfriend
vignette3

I can confidently say that about 90 percent of all the friends I have are male. It's just always been that way since I was a kid. Over the years, I've heard a lot of things and I've learned a lot of things, and here it all is. Enjoy!

If you're a girl with a guy best friend you know that...

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments