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The Definitive Diet Coke Ranking

Keep calm and drink Diet Coke out of a can.

Dec 29, 2015

I love Diet Coke. It is my coffee and my water. I crave nothing like I crave Diet Coke. You could say I'm an addict. My mom won't buy it for me sometimes, but I still love and need my daily dose of Diet Coke. When people tell me it causes cancer, I respond with "I may die young, but I'm enjoying my DC today." Although I don't love many things as much as I love Diet Coke, I'm very particular in how I drink the best drink known to man.

1. In an Aluminum Bottle

This doesn't even taste like Diet Coke, so I don't know why this has ever been a thing. (@Coca Cola)

2. In a Bottle

I love Diet Coke an insane amount; however, I will drink it out of bottle in almost no scenario. It gets flat way too quickly, and the fizz lasts only when you open it. Also, this has little to no crisp whatsoever.

3. 1.5 L Bottle

Because the only time this is actually acceptable is when everyone is filling up cups with this, and even then, I'm still questioning it.

4. A Can

Truly the best way to drink DC at home. No taste can compare to the crisp, cool feeling that fills your mouth when you take the silver aluminum can out of the refrigerator. Even though I personally love room-temperature Diet Coke, a cold one will do the trick. This also takes a while to get flat, so yay. BRB—while I go get another one.

5. A Fountain Diet Coke

This is the holy grail of Diet Coke drinking. The crispness is forever crisp, it's always cool, and there are (normally) always refills. It is honestly one of my favorite parts of a dining experience.

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The Definitive Diet Coke Ranking

Keep calm and drink Diet Coke out of a can.

1. In an Aluminum Bottle

2. In a Bottle

3. 1.5 L Bottle

4. A Can

5. A Fountain Diet Coke

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No one best represents the struggle like our favorite 90s squad.

1. When course schedules are released and you have a conflict between two required classes.

2. When there is only one section of a popular course.

3. Receiving the 18,000 emails reminding you to register ASAP.

4. When you need to see an advisor, but they are too busy/unresponsive.

5. Trying not to dress like a bum for your appointments with your advisors/department heads.

6. When you have a perfectly planned out schedule, and one class ruins it.

7. Carefully moving things around to accommodate a different class/section.

8. Waking up at 6:00 a.m. for your enrollment time.

9. Concocting a new schedule at your enrollment time after your original plan gets changed.

10. Getting into a class and filling the last available seat.

11. When all of your classes finally go through.

12. Realizing that you forgot a class that was a pre-requisite for everything else.

When your capability of "adulting" is put to the test

Nobody deserves to be living in poverty.

"Nobody living in one of the most influential nations in the world should be worried about making ends meet."

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1. When you have to provide an "interesting fact" for your first day ice-breaker.

2. When your professor is babbling on and on in his lecture.

3. When you edit your friend's paper and they get an A.

4. When it's 2 AM and you remember you have a test tomorrow.

5. When you finish taking the test and you're pretty sure you failed...

6. ...but then you get the test back and somehow passed.

7. When you've been up for 12 hours straight writing a paper.

8. And then you manage to stay awake in class the next day.

9. When you have to butter up your professor for an extra credit opportunity.

10. When you're assigned a group project.

11. And your group-mates are trying to chat about life instead of the assignment.

12. When it's your last class of the day and you're about to go home.

13. But then you remember rent is due tonight and the anger comes back.

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