Who knew it could be so real?
A crowd of people standing in a room. None alike. A collage of varying appearances, backgrounds, and personalities. Each one aware you’re eyeing them. Gathering information about their lives only through observation. Giving your greatest attempt to try and understand who they are, what they believe, how they feel, where they come from.
Pick three.
You are asked to pick three individuals out of a large crowd. Which stand out to you simply based on what you take in? You cannot talk to them yet. You know nothing about any of them. Everything you gather about them is simply an interpretation based on your own beliefs. Your first impression hasn’t had a chance to fully form. You choose three individuals solely based on judgement. Which three do you choose?
One: The loudest one of all. A personality so overpowering, it’s impossible to ignore. Her voice demands attention. Her energy radiates the room. She is alive and she wants everyone to know. You get a chance to talk to her; to get to know her. She is in her mid-thirty’s. A mother of three. Happily married to the man who has had her heart since high school. She’s good at her what she does. She is fearless.
Two: The woman dead center, front row. She is practically perfect in every way. Her hair is done up, lacking a single stray. Her skin is clear, her body is fit, and her clothes were more or less made for her. You get a chance to talk to her; to get to know her. She’s a lawyer. Her job pays well. She comes from a wealthy family. She owns a yacht. Even the words she speaks come out flawlessly. She is successful.
Three: The muscular man leaning against the wall, hands in his pockets. He is ruggedly handsome. His jawline crafted perfectly, his eyes piercing blue, and his smile glowing white. You get a chance to talk to him; to get to know him. He’s a college athlete. A football player. His skills are remarkable and his personality is humble. His genuine smile is hard not to reciprocate. He is kind, he is caring. He is selfless.
These three individuals have incredible stories. Each entirely different from the next. You learned about the most interesting parts of their lives. Anyone would be lucky to have someone like the three of them in their life. In such a short time, their existence has impacted you in a way that is unimaginable.
But what they don’t realize is just that: they impact the people in their lives in such a positive way. They don’t realize that they are important. That they are loved.
Depression is a vicious snake that sneaks up on you and attacks. Before knowing it, the snake is completely wrapped around your body, cutting off the circulation. It happens slowly, and then all at once. You see, the snake is patient. It is smart. It knows when the optimum time to strike its prey is. It is silent. Many aren’t aware how close the snake actually is. In fact, many are too distracted to notice the snake slithering its way up their back. It is strong, freeing from its release can seem impossible. The worst part is, you feel like you're on your own. You can’t call for help. The snake has a firm grip around your throat, allowing no sound to escape. You fight against this monster with no arms, no legs, with nothing other than will.
This snake finds comfort in ensuing pain. It would rather you live in agony than die a sudden, painless death. The snake is heavy. Its weight pulls you to the floor. Your head hangs, your shoulders slouch, your knees wither. The snake tightens its grasp around your chest. You can practically feel your ribs breaking beneath your skin. Your heart struggles to beat. It feels as though it has been impaled by a agged chunk of your broken rib. Your lungs tighten. You struggle for air. Your stomach knots and aches. It is the most painful, torturous experience to ever be a part of.
Depression is also blinding. The snake covers your eyes and forces a distorted image in your head. You see nothing but darkness and the pain you feel. You forget how loved you are, how important you are. You wonder why no one is helping you. Why no one notices you being taken over by this vicious entity. You lose the urge to fight for life. It’s easier to just give in. Let the snake crush you. No one will notice.
But you’re wrong.
The thing about depression is that it infects a lot of people that seem to be perfectly fine. Its affect is camouflaged by loud mouths, radiant smiles, and abundant success.
One: She is heartbroken. She has felt this uncomfortable pain for years now. Not her husband, nor her children, have noticed the change in her state of mind. She demands attention. She is screaming for help. She is begging for someone to notice that she is not okay. She is loud because she wants to be heard. She wants people to notice how she feels. She wants someone to show her that they understand, that they are there for her, and that they will help her free herself from the snake. She fears she cannot do this alone.
Two: She isn’t good enough. Her family only cares about money. She does her best to be successful, to be pretty, to be perfect. She tries her hardest to be and do what is expected of her. But it’s never enough. All the money in the world couldn’t buy her happiness. The snake has been fighting for power over her throughout her life. She does what she can to be enough for her parents, in hopes of approval being the escape. She needs someone to show her how proud they are. She needs someone to tell her that she doesn’t have to be perfect. That she is enough, just the way she is.
Three: He is alone. He hides his pain behind his good looks. He wishes nothing more than to end the suffering. He is convinced that no one will truly miss him if he was gone. He knows many people, but has very few true friends. He is a symbol of strength and feels that he cannot share his pain with anyone, for fear of appearing weak. He mistakes himself for being pathetic for feeling this way, rather than misunderstood. He shuts the world out which only makes the snake stronger. He needs someone to care about him personally, rather than what he has to offer. He needs someone to be there for him simply because they want to, not because he is handsome or talented. He needs someone to lean on and share his pain with. He needs someone he can trust.
Depression takes away lives far too soon, leaving unanswered questions for all those affected by the death of their loved one. There is never closure. Sometimes the snake is so good at its job, that not even those closest to the victim are aware of the pain they had been enduring. After a life has been taken, shock pounds at those whose hearts have been broken. Many people blame themselves. They blame themselves for not noticing and not doing anything to prevent such a from happening.
But that’s the thing about depression – no one sees it coming. The victims don’t understand what is happening either. They just assume they’re being weak, or that no one cares.
Which is why it’s important to talk. If you are depressed, you should let those around you know. You should talk to someone – anyone. Sharing that you feel a certain way is the easiest way to release yourself from the snake’s grip. Find an outlet. Find something that brings you joy, whether it be reading, exercising, drawing, sewing, anything at all. Escape to that outlet as often as you can. Most importantly, don’t forget who you are. Remind yourself that you are loved. Remind yourself that you are strong. And remind yourself that you are not a quitter. Don’t give up on yourself.
The same message goes to everyone else out there. Remember who you are and what you stand for. Be kind, be humble, be generous. Say hello to the person you’re stuck in the elevator with. Compliment strangers and thank those who offer you kindness. It's amazing how one thoughtful gesture can change everything. Remember what is really important in life. Don’t dwell on the small stuff but rejoice in the little things. Be someone who radiates positive energy. Life is easier that way.
Because happiness.
Who knew it could be so simple?
