Ask anyone who knows me about my borderline-crazy obsession with the show “The O.C.” I mean, hello?! My username over at Post Grad Problems is literally Summer Roberts; we have the same initials AND she may be even sassier than I am. It’s fate, it’s destiny (and I, too, like burritos).

If you didn’t pick up on that joke, stop reading now.

But I digress. Was the show sometimes totally over-the-top and unrealistic? Yes. Did it have an absolute killer soundtrack? Also yes. Was it witty, relatable, heart-breaking, and comforting, all at the same time? Check. Did Seth Cohen give Jewish girls everywhere a totally unattainable idea of the perfect NJB (Nice Jewish Boy. Get with the program.)? Definitely.

So when I saw a post about the "14 Top Significant Others On Friends," I knew I had to jump on the internet bandwagon. Or in this case, coffee cart. Here’s every relationship from the show, ranked worst to best. I should know.

22. Eddie and Theresa

I literally have nightmares about him. Everything about this relationship was awful.

21. Ryan and Theresa

As much as I don’t like Marissa, you broke the two of them up, made Ryan come back to Chino to take care of a baby that wasn’t even his (arguably), and then have the nerve to come back in the third season, why? Please go back to Chino and say there forever, Theresa. Let Ryan live his life.

20. Ryan and Lindsay

I’m sorry, did you say something? I was sleeping. I appreciate you being down-to-earth there, Linds, but there was less than nothing in terms of chemistry between the two of you guys.

19. Johnny and Marissa

I’m not kidding, I was thiiiiis close to forgetting this one. I almost want to feel bad for Mr. Ray-of-sunshine-on-a-cloudy-day over here, but then I remember that I don’t. He was the worst. On second thought, though, maybe Marissa and him were made for each other.

18. Oliver and Marissa

Technically, not an actual relationship. Just one of the worst characters in TV history to ever grace our screens, obsessing over, well, another one of the worst characters in TV history to ever grace our screens. Pro tip: watch the first episode of “Southland” and watch Ben McKenzie’s character arrest Taylor Handley’s, and tell me it’s not one of the most satisfying things you’ve ever seen. You can thank me later.

17. Trey and Jess

Yes, because all healthy relationships start when a girl is floating facedown in a pool after nearly overdosing on drugs. Really raising the bar high here, guys.

16. Volchok and Marissa

Taking being emotionally unavailable to the next level since 2006.

15. Jimmy and Julie

Stop trying to make it happen, guys. It’s not going to happen. Also, for the love of God, stop saying the word “fantastic,” Jimmy. It’s not fantastic. You lost all of your clients’ money and totally abandoned your family. Twice. And, to top it all off — you forgot Julie’s froyo! How could you even do such a thing?

14. The Bullit and Julie

Helpful hint: she doesn’t actually like you, Bullit. She likes your money. Run while you can. And no, Kaitlin, you can’t still play ping pong together. Bang.

13. Luke and Marissa

Luke was more concerned with shaving his chest than his girlfriend. That says all you’ll ever need to know about these two idiots.

12. Luke and Julie

This was such a hard one to place. On one hand, she’s sleeping with her daughter’s ex. On the other hand, she’s sleeping with her daughter’s ex—this is what makes good television, people! Also, shoutout to Julie for being on this list hands down more times than anyone else. You go girl.

11. Caleb and Julie

If the fact that Caleb is Julie’s best friend’s dad doesn’t sum up this totally messed up relationship perfectly, I don’t know what will. Cheers to you guys, just don’t forget to add the sleeping pills to the margaritas.

10. Seth and Alex

Separately, both characters are awesome. Together? Not so much. They had their cute moments, but Seth was way too nerdy for her and Alex was way too edgy for him. Oh, and nevermind the fact that Alex was into girls. Minor details.

9. Seth and Anna

This one pains me. Don’t get me wrong, I really did like Anna. She’s quirky and funny and actually has a personality, unlike some other people we know *cough Marissa cough*… but like, no. She just didn’t belong with Seth. They were weirdly similar and she didn’t challenge him. Also, I don’t like her hair. And Pittsburgh? Ew.

8. Dr. Roberts and Julie

Honestly, this is such an underrated relationship. They started dating right after they both got out of really difficult relationships and totally got what the other was going for. He only wanted to be there for her after Marissa died, and had it actually worked out between the two of them, and Marissa hadn’t, ya know, died, Summer and Marissa would have actually been sisters. Win win situation.

7. Zach and Summer

Oh, Zach. You’re so cute, but so boring. But in all fairness, if my boyfriend sailed away on his boat for the summer without telling me, I would start dating someone that looked like you, too. I also would have waited until after the wedding in Italy to break up with you. Girl’s gotta eat, Ducky.

6. Frank and Julie

She ate a corndog for him. Enough said.

5. Ryan and Marissa

At first, I loved them. I really did. Classic “girl-next-door” meets bad boy from the other side of the tracks. Luke was an idiot and Ryan was different, interesting, and didn’t drive an obnoxious Hummer. it’s all the makings of a pop culture phenomenon. But it’s almost like when Ryan responded that he would be “whoever you want me to be,” Marissa was like, “oh perfect! I need someone to save me from myself, actually!” and she dragged him down with her. She was always a mess, miserable, and only had one facial expression, and basically almost ruined Ryan’s life. I’ll never understand why people think you guys are the dream couple, but I feel obligated to list you in the top five because of that. Am I the best or what?

4. Alex and Marissa

Keep it in your pants, there, gentlemen. They were totally dysfunctional, yes, but they had insane chemistry and the show cut off what could have happened with this relationship way too soon. Alex almost made Marissa interesting again. Almost.

3. Ryan and Taylor

Calm yourselves. This is not an endorsement of Taylor Townsend; the girl’s a nutjob and the two of them as a couple made absolutely no sense. Seriously, she gives Taylor Swift a run for her money (it must be the name). But can we take a second to think about what she did for Ryan? She made him happy… And that’s more than I can say for you, Marissa *Kirsten Cohen voice*. Instead of gloomy, brooding Ryan, we had happy, occasionally smiley Ryan. Yes, Ryan! Instead of rescuing her from alleyways in Tijuana, he rescued her after falling off a ladder and into a parallel universe. That’s gotta count for something.

2. Sandy and Kirsten

We’re just going to have to look over that one time that Sandy harbored a fugitive… who also happened to be his ex-girlfriend. Other than that, A+, guys.

1. Seth and Summer

What in the world did you think was going to be listed here? You realize who is writing this article, right? Let’s be real here, though—they’re perfect. He named his boat after her. He stood up on a coffee cart and confessed his love for her. Their tension was undeniable. They were together even when they weren’t together, and brought out the best in each other. Who wouldn’t want a relationship like that?