This last week, I went through a process more bittersweet than anything I'd ever experienced before. Sorority recruitment took place on my campus, and I've never been so joyful, or so (temporarily) heartbroken, before.

For the first time, I was behind the scenes of recruitment. I went through and found my own home last year, so now it was my turn to persuade girls that my home could also be theirs. However, it turned out quite the opposite.

Through the week, I encountered a ton of sweet girls that I wanted to be best friends with. I didn't want to ever stop talking to them, and I wanted to share a sisterhood with them more than anything. Despite all my wishes and my prayers, they all ended up going different ways- specifically one way. Every girl that I recruited and fell in love with went to the same chapter, and it wasn't mine. You can imagine my disappointment when I wouldn't have anyone that knew me running into my arms on bid day, and so my mind started thinking.

I wondered, "What else could I have said that would have made them want to be a part of my chapter?". It didn't take long before I felt defeated, for it was too late anyways. After thinking about my own recruitment process, I realized there's no perfect equation to choosing a chapter. There are not certain words that can be said or things that can be done to get a girl into your chapter, they just have to have "that feeling". "That feeling" is this weird mix of joy and relief and curiosity and excitement when a girl realizes that's where she belongs and she doesn't want to go anywhere else.

But what does it mean when all the girls you love don't have that feeling at your own chapter? It doesn't mean anything of your own recruiting abilities, and it most importantly doesn't mean that you can't be friends with them. I am here to assure girls on both sides of recruitment that the friendships you can have once recruitment is over are not classified by matching greek letters.

Today, I was reminded by a new sweet friend, that everyone ends up where they're supposed to be. Whether it's a short process or a long one, an easy or a hard one, God places each girl in a sorority where they will grow, be challenged, and feel most comfortable. He places them in the sorority where girls will pour into them and where they can thrive the most. He places them in the chapter where their home really is forever, and we have to trust in His placement and plan.

It took me a few days to find peace with all of my girls going to a different chapter (sounds silly, I know- and it was), but my earlier mentioned sweet friend proved to me, as we hung out four days after recruitment ended, that the chapter they went didn't change their feelings for me and it didn't change the potentiality of our friendship. Every girl was just as available for a long-lasting friendship with me, regardless of the letters on their chest.

And so today I realized that nothing is more bittersweet than recruitment.

Recruitment can be so bitter. You see girls go different chapters and you see girls you love get released. But recruitment is also so, so, so sweet. It's an open door to developing relationships with girls quite like you, and you decide if the door remains open or if it closes. And with the girls that you fell in love with during the week, you still get to see the joy on their faces while they run home and experience the sisterhood they want to be a part of.

Two days after recruitment, I asked myself, "Would you rather see them run to your chapter with little excitement, or to a different chapter with overwhelming joy and a huge smile plastered on their face?". The answer was clear, and ever since then I've been beyond excited for them to experience their own sisterhood that will love and challenge.

So recruitment really is bittersweet. But I also think there's a reason that the 'sweet' comes after the "bitter".