Dear 13 Year Old Me:
I’m a little bit emotional right now, because there is so much I can say to you. So much to remind you of. So much insight to offer you. I want you to know that you will make it to 19 in one piece. Regardless of whatever stage of self-destruction you find yourself to be in right now, you will be okay. That D you got in math on your 7th grade report card isn’t going to make a difference once you drop math your senior year of high school. Middle school literally sucks. It is a terrible time in everyones lives, and I know its probably hard to see past it right now, but high school is great, and college is even better. Don’t worry. Absolutely nothing I did in middle school matters at this point in my life. Not my grades, not the fights I got into, not the projects I did or the cellphones I had.
Not everything is going to be a breeze. You’re going to want to give up. Sophomore year, you’re going to have a ton of opportunities thrown at you. Incredible opportunities. But you’re also going to hit a low point. Fight it out, its gonna be okay. You’re going to learn a lot about yourself. One thing you will never regret is putting my music before school. Had I put my schoolwork first, I would not have made it through that year. Its okay to put yourself and what you love before what other people think makes sense. Never feel guilty about doing what you love, and doing what YOU need to do in order to make it through. And believe me when I say that you will find the light at the end of the tunnel, no matter how dark it gets.
When it comes to music, you need to just get out there and play. Don’t second guess getting involved in music in High School. That music room will become your second home for those four years. You’ll write some of your best songs, have some of your biggest musical triumphs, and you’ll meet some of your greatest friends there. Music is the one constant in your life. Go play that open mic. That song you wrote about death, addiction, sadness… no, its not too depressing. Those will prove to be your best hits. Wait until you see how far you go in music. iTunes? Shows in New York City? Get excited, younger me. You’re gonna go far.
Friends will come and go. The ones that have been there since the very beginning will always be there. But the friends that you’re close with now are not the ones you’ll be close with when you graduate high school. You will go through a few different friend groups, and its gonna suck when things go wrong. But let me tell you something. When you find those few best friends, they are going to mean the world to you. You are going to have the best times with them, and forget you even had any other friends in the first place. I know in middle school, its all about quantity, not quality, but when you get older you’ll really learn to appreciate the quality of a friend.
You’re going to be young and have to make hard decisions. You know what the right one is. Choose it. Don’t second guess yourself, always remember that. Sometimes you have to get up and leave, no matter how much you think you should stay. Don’t blame yourself when things go downhill. It only gets worse before it gets better, and you’re going to worry for years and years, but I’m here to tell you that the time you spend worrying is a waste because the person you have been losing sleep over will finally be forced to better themselves.
Grades matter, don’t get me wrong. But don’t make yourself suffer over them. You’re going to get into college. You’re gonna do what you wanna do in life, trust me. Be easy on yourself. Work hard without overworking yourself, because as I said before, school is important, but so is your mental health. Put yourself first, and if you are struggling, reach out.
13 year old me, I know you don’t, but I want you to love yourself. Start to treat yourself right. The way you look now is not the way you’re going to look forever. If I could show you a picture of yourself in a few years you would think you’re beautiful. You don’t realize it yet, but you are strong, independent, beautiful (yes, beautiful!) and free. You have your whole teenage life ahead of you. I don’t anymore. I spent my teenage years in a constant battle with my body, only to realize that there was absolutely no point. So, 13 year old me, take the world by storm. There is nothing you won’t be able to do. Take the chances I was too afraid to take. Be daring. Sing a little louder. Laugh at stupid things. Get home past curfew when you turn 17, your mom will be asleep anyway. Live a little. Thats what being a teenager is about.
-Your Future Self
