Let me begin this by saying I no longer hate you. I did for a long time, but not anymore. I think everyone goes through a relationship in their life when they date someone that is manipulative and controlling. I was seventeen when I went through mine. He was older, more mature (or so I thought), at the time I thought he was the best thing since sliced bread.
It started out as most teenage relationships do. Messaging on Twitter, SnapChatting, hanging out in his parent's basement watching Netflix. He quickly told me he loved me, promised me forever, and even bought me a promise ring. I had never gotten jewelry from a guy before, I thought he actually loved me. When I left for a college that was three hours away, things changed quickly. I suppose they did not change, I just became more aware of them.
Our typical ten-minute phone calls turned into ten hours of non-stop contact, via texting, calling, FaceTiming, SnapChatting, all of it. If he did not hear from me within a half hour my phone would light up with missed phone calls and texts. When I decided to rush for a sorority, something I always wanted to do, I was ridiculed for it. I was convinced that it was wrong, and ended up quitting before I even got started. The promise ring was no longer a promise to me, it was a reminder to tell me that I, "belonged", to him. A feeling I deep down actually hated, but I believed this was love.
Come the spring time I transferred to a college close to him, because I thought I missed him. That's when all the fighting began. Every day we would argue. Every day I would do something that would make him angry with me. Every day he would do something that made me angry. I would wake up, go to school, go to work, and sleep. I had no friends, no relationship with my parents, I had nobody but him. After a year, I was broken up with. I was absolutely heart broken, because I believed this relationship we had was true love. I believed that his actions of being controlling and manipulative were him showing he cared about my well being.
Here I am, a year and a half after getting dumped. Happier than I've been in a long time. I rushed a sorority at my new school, and am able to enjoy it like I should have been able to the first time.
I have friends that I would have never had unless I came home to go to school. I would not have a good relationship with my parents if I wouldn't have gotten dumped. I would not have moved out and created a happier environment for myself. I would not have met my boyfriend, that I have been happily with for four months now.
I am so incredibly thankful that I had you in my life, because you taught me that I deserve better. I deserve to be happy. I deserve to live a life that I want to live. Having girl friends to talk to, loving parents, and a boyfriend that treats me like the diamond in the rough that I am, is why I am so glad you put me through hell. Without you, I would not have the wonderful and loving people in my life that I have today.
Thank you.
