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Dear Stephen Curry

You Gotta Chill

12
Dear Stephen Curry
HerCampus.com

Dear Stephen Curry,

You need to stop. You are way too good to be playing in the NBA and it's time that you've moved on to a better league. You're like the 6'5" 13-year-old in the Little League World Series that should be playing on the big field, but instead throws 85mph from 46 feet away. Steph man, you just don't belong anymore I'm sorry. If there is a league with the Monstars from Space Jam I suggest you start looking there for a team with an open spot on their roster. Now I get that you're good and all but when you do things like this (see video below) it's just clearly not fair.

Or when you do this:


Dude how are they supposed to guard you when you're that far away? Do you even use the three-point line? Do you know what it is? You also realize that you, as a human being (I think), are not supposed to be able to do this either:


You just hit 12 three's in one game, after hitting 10 in the game before, while also breaking the single season record for three's made in a season and it's only February. In case you're not good at math, which you probably are because you're a robot (whoops was trying to keep that under the radar sorry bro), you're probably going to make 400 three-point field goals this season. That would be like a baseball player hitting 80 home runs in a season. You have three straight 40 point games and have scored 50 points three times when you didn't even play four quarters. Also dude, pretty much every record you're breaking this season was already your record before so I don't even know what to say about that.

So I guess what I'm trying to say Steph is that yeah, you're a lot of fun to watch, but you could be doing bigger and better things elsewhere. I'm really just trying to help you out. If you found a better league to play in you could prove just how talented you are even more. I know that you're having fun because (compared to you) you're playing 12-year-olds, but let's not be afraid of playing some better competition. If you find another league, I'll stop having dunk contests on seven-foot hoops, because I think that's pretty equivalent to your situation. Deal?

I'll help you out if you need it. Just give me a call, you have my number.

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