Dear Starbucks Customers,
Whether you are a regular customer at our stores or you just stop in for your favorite seasonal drinks, please listen to everything this letter is about to tell you. Yes, we know that fall is actually rolling around and all of the lovely Pumpkin Spice flavors are coming out for everything. Especially our Pumpkin Spice Latte. CUSTOMERS PLEASE do not come up to our counter and ask for a "PSL" and not know the names of our sizes of our cups. That is just proof enough that you have no clue about Starbucks and that you are clearly just there to fit in with the crowd.
Also customers, please note that if you ask for extra shots in your frappuccinos, it will make your drink very watery. This is because the shots of espresso are very hot, so hot that it can burn your skin. Please do not complain that your frappuccino is not thick enough if you order a quad shot caramel frap with extra caramel. I feel no remorse for you; you knew better. Frappuccinos are a barista's worst enemy to begin with, but being the people that we are, we make each drink correctly and with love but deep inside we actually cannot stand them; they're from the devil.
Do you know what else really grinds my gears? The word ESPRESSO does not have an X in it in any form or fashion. A customer that comes into my store and asks for an extra shot of "expresso" in their drink makes me want to go pull a 5 lb. bag just to show them the correct spelling of the word. Even though the words do sound very similar, they are not the same. Also, a frappuccino is a not a frappe. A frappe is from McDonald's and ours are not the same thing. So if a barista does correct you, please do not be offended. We simply take pride in our hand crafted beverages.
We love all of our customers, every single one of you. There are just some things that really bother us as barista's, not all the blame is on you though. We probably take our job too seriously sometimes but we are what get people's days going and we keep them awake to cram for exams. So yes, coffee is a serious deal. We love every second of it, and we want you to enjoy your experience with us!