Dear Soulja Boy Tell Em,
It has been a while. I hope you are doing well, but I bet right now you're in despair. And being on the outside looking in, I am as well.
For years, you were the man. Your funny lyrics (when we understood them) and catchy beats kept us excited and ready to call in on the radio to request your newest song. Being a genuine middle school kid during the majority of your reign, you were personally my favorite. But now, you are being forgotten by many.
Why am I sorry? I am sorry because people are forgetting the greatest dance craze of all time, Crank That (Soulja Boy).
In today's society, we are surrounded by nonsense. It all started with the Whip and Nae Nae. Then, once that began to fade, everyone started to Hit the Quan and Dab after every sentence. And do not get me started on the JuJu on that Beat. But to make matters worse, we are forgetting how to Crank That Soulja Boy and it seriously makes me sad.
I can remember when the Soulja Boy dance was the most requested song at middle school dances. We taught it to our friends, our parents, and anyone who said "wait, how do you do the Soulja Boy?" It was my first ringtone on my Nokia flip phone. It was a lot of things to many, and now slowly, it is drifting away from our memory.
And, if we're honest, another big reason as to why this upsets me so much is because if kids don't know who you are, it means I'm really growing up.
I don't understand what middle school kids talk about nowadays (and I'm not really sure if I want to), I have way more responsibilities than my chores and doing my social studies homework, and everything that I once thought was cool and hip is featured on an MTV remember when show.
So, Soulja Boy, I'm sorry they are forgetting about you. I'm sorry you are getting replaced. Because I am too. And actually, it will be okay. We can Crank That and reminisce on the late 2000s together. Leave these new crazes to the new youngsters. But, me and my friends, we'll still remember those nights in our mom's car when your song came and for 2 minutes we were super swaggy. And if it makes you feel better, I still try to bring back the Soulja Boy dance any chance I get.
Thanks for being you Soulja Boy. I'm sorry we're getting old.
Love,
K-Swizzle (okay, maybe we'll forget about that nickname)
Attention: for those of you who have stumbled upon this letter and may be one of those who I am referring to about never getting to experience the greatness of this dance phenomenon, I have attached a link for your enjoyment. I hope it impacts your life like it has for me.
