Dear Mom and Dad,

Hey, it's your daughter. To put it bluntly, I've been a real drag since I've been home from college. I know this. I'm moping around the house in sweatpants, sadly watching Netflix, and not chuckling as loudly at your dumb jokes about the cats. It's not you guys, I promise. It's PFYD (post-freshman year depression). PFYD is a very real thing, and it's hitting me hard right about now.

It's not real depression. I know that it's temporary. I'm not that dramatic, it's just a very bizarre time for me. I just recently had to watch my glamorous, catastrophic, perfectly imperfect first year of college get smaller and smaller in the rearview mirror as we drove back to Cleveland. I had to say goodbye to an entire chapter of my life. I had to say goodbye to living with my newfound best friend and roommate, to my 7 perfect future housemates, to 3 a.m. pizza deliveries, to a musty dorm room the size of a shoebox that we loved unconditionally, and to late nights acting like fools at the bars (not that I'm there drinking of course, because I'm under 21). But anyway, I miss my life at school. That's why I've been so awful lately.

Now don't get me wrong, you guys are obviously the best parents out there. I've made that very clear multiple times. Not only that, but there are a ton of things about home that I love so much that college doesn't have. (You guys are at the top of that list.) Home-cooked food, showering without flip flops, pets to cuddle, my heavenly bed, the smell of our house, and all the familiar faces of a suburban town are just a couple more. Plus, I'm sure my liver is thinking, "Wow, this is a nice change of pace."

But along with every one of these great things about the comfort of home comes an abundance of things I miss about my life in Columbus as well.

The transition from college to home is, for lack of a better word, weird. You go from consistently being around other people and socializing, to many times having an entire house to yourself for a couple of hours on end... which for an extrovert like me can feel like five days of solitude. You go from having endless food options to pick from at 1 a.m., to settling for those leftover chicken nuggets in the fridge because you've exhausted all other resources and nothing is open past 10 p.m. in suburbia.

You go from binge-watching "America's Next Top Model" until 3 a.m. cuddling with all your floor mates to binge-watching "America's Next Top Model" until 3 a.m. cuddling with your uninterested cat -- which, for the record, is a lot more depressing. Lastly and also most juxtaposed in my mind, you go from dancing to "Trap Queen" on a table (or some elevated surface) at a frat party in lipstick and heels, to dancing to "Trap Queen" around your kitchen with no makeup in your oversized "I love Chipotle" shirt and underwear, singing into your hairbrush. (Sorry, you probably don't know what "Trap Queen" is. It's probably best we leave it that way.)

You may be wondering why I'm addressing this letter to you guys. Well, not only is it an apology for my constant glum behavior, but it's also a thank you. No no, not for the obvious "you pushed me to get good grades in high school and inspired me to go to college" cliché reason that I've already thanked you for time and time again. I'm thanking you for raising me to thrive on my own, so much that it's actually difficult to come back to an already amazing place like home. I'm thanking you for showing me what a home really is, and how to know when I've found it.

Starting my freshman year, I would have never thought that I would have such a hard time coming home. I love home. I love you guys, I love our town, I love our house. I thought that by the end of the year I would be deathly homesick and done with Columbus and the people around me. I mean, I did predict to be sad about leaving, but the happy kind of sad that's just ready to get home finally. Kind of like how you feel at the end of a summer camp or long vacation.

I would have never guessed that leaving school would feel like leaving an entire life behind. I would have never guessed that leaving school would feel like leaving a piece of who I am behind for a whole summer. I would have never expected to find a home. A happy place.

But the reason I was able to to find my home, the reason I was able to know it is my home, is all because of you two.

From the moment I was born, you've prepared me for this. You taught me what a home was. A place where you feel loved, accepted, cherished, celebrated, safe, comfortable. That warm fuzzy feeling that I've felt all my life when I step into our cozy home is how I feel when I'm sitting in the Oval with my friends. Walking through campus. Out on High Street. That feeling follows you when you've found home. When you've found a life. Your own, unique, special life.

Without you, I wouldn't know what home means. You gave me that. You gave me my first home, and now I have the opportunity to see how lucky I am to have found another. I would have never guessed that I would love anywhere as much as our house enough to call it "home."

You gave me the gifts to build and establish the foundation for a home. You gave me the skills and the power to create a space surrounding me where I can thrive, grow, evolve, and love for the next four years of my life.

You two gave me the courage to be myself, unapologetically and fearlessly. You said that if I did that, the right people will come to me. People that love me for who I am. People who bring out the best in me constantly and embrace the woman that you raised me to be. And they did.

You taught me that weird is good, and so is crazy. You taught me to be curious, to be passionate. You taught me how to care for and love people, genuinely. You taught me to step out of my comfort zone, and that only good can come out of that. And it did.

I found my home because of these traits given to me by you. You both truly prepared me for this life, and I thank you infinitely for that. Thank you for giving me a place to always come back home to, but for also raising me to find my own.

I understand the saying “home is where the heart is" a whole lot more now. I now know my heart is able to be in two places at once. And as my life goes on, I expect to grow and have dozens of homes as my heart explores more people, places and experiences. So if it ever feels like I'm anxious to get back to school or like I'm not grateful for what I have here at home, just know that this letter exists to prove that I am.

Winnie the Pooh once said, "How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard." I can't help but think of the past year when I think of this quote. Saying goodbye to you two and most recently, saying goodbye to my freshman year.

Thank you for making both of those goodbyes so hard.

Love,

Kate