Dear Jess,
Right now, you are so happy because you finally graduated high school. You are so excited because you are finally done. You have your eyes set on where you want to go from here, and you are hard-headed enough to get it. Those past four years have challenged you, broken you, built you, and changed you. You have grown more in four years and learned more about yourself than you ever thought was possible. You think you've "found yourself," but I'm writing to tell you, that you are just getting started.
In high school, you overcame some of your worst days, but lived in some of the best. Although you think that because you have been handed some pretty rough situations, you can handle anything. Well, let me tell you . . . college is going to throw you so far, it will have you crawling back, wishing life was how it is right now, even though you're so desperate to leave. My first piece of advice is this: Slow down. Don't be so ready to move out. Don't be too eager to drive away. Things are as easy at this moment as they are ever going to be again. The second you unpack your belongings into your cramped dorm room and wave your parents good-bye, real life is going to hit you hard. You thought high school was difficult and tiresome? Well, you will soon realize that in your college level anatomy class, you will be given all of the information from an entire semester of high school, in exactly three days. You will be expected to know the information by heart the night it was lectured to you, and come back tomorrow ready for a whole new chapter. Doesn't that sound fun? But wait, that's not all. I know you love sleeping in, and eating breakfast, and doing your hair in the mornings. This is not what you should expect because you are 100 percent anything but a morning person. Your alarm clock will be your worst enemy, coffee will be your best friend and also your breakfast, and a hat will be on your head every morning for your 8 am class. All in all, I need you to slow down and stop rushing the process of growing up; I know that is all you want to do, but just try.
The next rule to live by is: Appreciate the small stuff. Trust me, you'll miss putting dishes in the dishwasher and doing your laundry every day. Because one day, you won't have a dishwasher to use or a chance to clean your clothes for free (if you even have time to do that). Appreciate mom telling you to clean your room and your dad telling you to vacuum your car. Because soon, your room will be shared space that, most of the time, will be a mess, and you won't have the privilege of spending time in your car. Make sure to go outside and get exercise, because a lot of your time will be spent sitting in the library looking at a computer screen. When I say the small stuff, I mean the things I realized that were really the big and important stuff in my freshman year of college, like laughing with your little brother over the way your new puppy ran down the stairs. Soon enough, you will feel like a part of you is missing, because you will be missing out on precious memories: baseball games, lightning bug catching, growth spurts, family parties, etc. Treasure moments like this, because you will want them back more than anything on a lonely, stressful night, sitting in the middle of your piles of notes.
Last but not least, stay humble. When you get to college, all you will want to do is become a grown-up and do grown-up things. You will be so focused on you, that the world around you will be practically going right past you. Look around, look at others, pay attention. You are not always the focus. If there is one thing I have learned, it's that nothing will go as planned--so stop planning so much! Don't be so uptight, make new friends, release your boundaries, break down your walls; open up. Be kind to others, be talkative, be motivated. And when something doesn't go exactly how you planned it, don't stress about it. You will get so caught up in trying to do things as you schedule them, but it simply won't happen that way, like ever. Accept that. Put others before yourself, put school work before your wants, and measure out your priorities, not how you want them to be, but how you know they should be.
This letter to myself is a reminder to embrace the good times, pay attention to the present times, appreciate more often, and let go of the stressful day-to-day, hour-to-hour agenda. I know all of this now, but I wish I had known it before entering my first semester. It can only go up from here.
There is always a way to go-- I choose to go forward.
