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Dear God, I'm A Little Lost Right Now

An open letter to God about my current feelings.

Marissa Seib

Nov 28, 2016

Niagara University

103

The Mighty

Dear God,

I’m a little lost right now. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to be doing with my life. Which is really weird because a year ago I thought I had everything planned out. I was going to graduate high school, go to my realistic dream college, study history with a pre-law concentration and a specialization in US history, graduate in three years, go to law school, move across the country to Seattle and start my life.

But now? I’m a little lost. At least I think I’m a little lost. I’m not entirely sure. Am I lost, God? Or is this all a part of your plan? Because I have no idea.

I’m not sure if I like the college I’m at. When I chose it on March 8^th last year, the choice excited me. I felt like that NU was the place I was supposed to be for my college years. Life is good here, I’d recommend NU to anyone in a heartbeat. But I’m not sure if it’s for me. I know I want to graduate with a degree in history and I’m about 98% sure that I’m going to specialize in US history. I also know I can, and most likely will graduate in three years.

I don’t know if I still want to be a prosecuting attorney. Maybe I want to be a high school history teacher? Maybe I want to be a museum curator? Maybe I want to be something that I haven’t even thought of yet? I know I have time left to decide what I want to be, but I want to know now. I like knowing what I’m going to do with my life. Since I was eleven years old, I thought I was going to be a prosecuting attorney. Why does that determination have to wane now?

What about my friendships? I’m kind of lost and confused on a lot of those. It seems like I’m always trying harder. I write my friends letters and get nothing in response. I tell them I miss them and want to talk to them soon and get “I miss you too, but I’ve been so busy”. I wish I could know what relationships won’t matter in a few months and what ones I should keep trying at because they’re worth keeping. But God, are they worth keeping if I’m doing all the work? I constantly feel drained from trying to stay in touch with everybody and getting little back.

I don’t know about Seattle anymore, God. I know it’s beautiful and I want to go there and potentially live there someday. I just don’t know if I’ll ever be able to. Is it just some dream that I will look back on when I’m older and sigh because I never accomplished it?

God, it feels like there are so many unknowns in my life right now and I’m not sure what else to do besides turn to you for guidance. I’ve turned to others and asked for their advice, but they’re just as unsure as I am. I pray that soon you will send me an answer for at least one of my questions regarding my life. I pray that you will guide me on what to do and how to be happy throughout my whole life.

Love,

Your Daughter

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Dear God, I'm A Little Lost Right Now

An open letter to God about my current feelings.

Subscribe to our Newsletter

No one best represents the struggle like our favorite 90s squad.

1. When course schedules are released and you have a conflict between two required classes.

2. When there is only one section of a popular course.

3. Receiving the 18,000 emails reminding you to register ASAP.

4. When you need to see an advisor, but they are too busy/unresponsive.

5. Trying not to dress like a bum for your appointments with your advisors/department heads.

6. When you have a perfectly planned out schedule, and one class ruins it.

7. Carefully moving things around to accommodate a different class/section.

8. Waking up at 6:00 a.m. for your enrollment time.

9. Concocting a new schedule at your enrollment time after your original plan gets changed.

10. Getting into a class and filling the last available seat.

11. When all of your classes finally go through.

12. Realizing that you forgot a class that was a pre-requisite for everything else.

When your capability of "adulting" is put to the test

Nobody deserves to be living in poverty.

"Nobody living in one of the most influential nations in the world should be worried about making ends meet."

What is the current minimum wage at the federal level?

What are the benefits of raising the minimum wage?

What are the states that have set a $15/hour minimum wage?

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Because who understands your bitterness better than April?

1. When you have to provide an "interesting fact" for your first day ice-breaker.

2. When your professor is babbling on and on in his lecture.

3. When you edit your friend's paper and they get an A.

4. When it's 2 AM and you remember you have a test tomorrow.

5. When you finish taking the test and you're pretty sure you failed...

6. ...but then you get the test back and somehow passed.

7. When you've been up for 12 hours straight writing a paper.

8. And then you manage to stay awake in class the next day.

9. When you have to butter up your professor for an extra credit opportunity.

10. When you're assigned a group project.

11. And your group-mates are trying to chat about life instead of the assignment.

12. When it's your last class of the day and you're about to go home.

13. But then you remember rent is due tonight and the anger comes back.

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