Dear future boyfriend,

I'm a handful. I just want to open with that. So, thank you for being with me. I'm so happy that I've found someone, that I assume, is just as weird as I am. I refuse to date someone that isn't passionate about something, so I hope that we share the same passions. And if you've made it this far, we must share the same music taste.

Also, I assume that because we are dating, you've been approved by my sisters. It's scary how protective both my older and little sister can be over me although I am completely capable of making good decisions about people that I let into my life. It's extremely important to me that my sisters (and eventually the rest of my family) like you. So thank you for bearing with me--also I hope you know that they'll know all of the cute things--and stupid things--that you say. I apologize ahead of time for the pressure that may put on you, but thank you for being patient with me and my sisters hehe.

I also have hopes that I am liked by your family because although I hate to admit it--I'm sure you've realized by now that I am a huge people pleaser. I hope I have brought you happiness like I'm sure you have brought me. I want nothing more to make you as happy as I'm sure you make me. You've ought to be the cream of the crop, and I'm sorry for the cheesiness but I hope you know that I appreciate you more than words can describe.

Moreover, because I know myself... I'm sorry for being pushy, I only want best for everyone and I'm sorry for when I disregard my own health but it's only because I go full mom mode with people I care extremely about. Additionally... I'm sorry for being testy and testing you because this is where I have made dire mistakes before. It's unhealthy for my relationships and friendships, I know, but I have tried hard to stop but this is how I ensure people are going to be around for the long haul. I'm really sorry for testing you although you must have caught on... or at least I hope that you've caught on and you pass with flying colors each and every time. I appreciate you!

Also! I hope that regardless of if you are a cat person or not, that you absolutely love my cats. I'm sure that you know by now that they are my fur babies and I love them more than I love myself. And if you're allergic, I am so incredibly sorry about the cat hairs but I still hope that you love them as much as I do.

I hope that you know how much I appreciate and care for you. Although I may not always be the best at showing it, I hope you know that I have a deep appreciation for you. Moreover, please never feel the need to buy me anything crazy. To be honest, a trip to used bookstores or the museum make me a hundred times happier than a dinner at a fancy restaurant. Although I absolutely love dressing up, even if I'm not going out.

On a more serious note, I hope that by now I have a better handle on both my depression and anxiety and that does not become a hard spot for us. I know that when I'm in a bad spot it's extremely hard to get me out of my head so thank you for being patient with me and reminding me of all the little things that matter. And I think that's where my test-iness comes from, the insecurity from simply "not being enough." And if during one of these rough spots, I urge you to break up with me, please do not listen to me. You're a real trooper for knowing how to interact with me during my depressed states. Sometimes, I just want to be alone and know that you're around. Eliza used to just sit with me when I would get upset, and I miss her tons when I get upset. Sitting in silence is comforting to me.

Again, thank you. I've been (im)patiently waiting and praying for you. I've been working on myself and constantly bettering myself for when I finally meet my match. And I guess that's you! Thank you for being with me, here's to much more time with you... I hope, hehe.

Xoxo,
Your present-day girlfriend