Are you between the ages of 13 and19? If you answered yes to this question, that means you are dumb, a bad driver, immature, irresponsible, addicted to sex, drugs, and alcohol and just overall not a real person.

Your life is absolutely meaningless and you in no way shape or form deserve respect. Also DO NOT forget to respect your elders, remember they are always right. Biggest lesson adults will teach you is be careful what you post on social media.

“Mom Groups” on Facebook are a perfect representation of a modern-day Mean Girls burn book.

You will find pictures of kids in their cars texting and driving, meanwhile, how did this person even take that picture? You will find posts about kids doing drugs when in reality, chances are they were just giving their friend a tic tac. Mom groups have become an ultimate way for parents to belittle teenagers when they are sitting in their local town drinking their grande pumpkin spice latte with an extra pump of Slander.

My absolute favorite is them being the first ones to defend anything having to do with them because let’s face it, they are all perfect.

Now, let's switch roles real quick: picture us, the high schoolers having a Facebook group. Now, picture me, a 17-year-old girl taking a picture of a lady who can’t park in front of our local CVS, now I post it. Ten minutes later I have the local police banging on my door because the lady left her kid in the car and I posted it without her permission and now I have a law-suit on my hands. We all know this is true.

Every day I see a new victim crying over the fact they were publicly humiliated over the fact that they were slightly over the line in a parking space, or because we were in our local McDonald's at 12 AM like its a crime. Parents need to grow up and stop posting about kids like we're criminals... What if it was your kid? You don't see me posting about your affairs, or the fact that Kathy drank a little too much during the pottery and wine night at Artragous, Betty’s husband cheated on her while she was at yoga, and that one time Mrs. Smith just happened to hit a kid while backing out her driveway.

So, Mom’s, next time I'm on my way to work at my local toy store where I ring all of you up so your children, who will also one day become drug addicts who do shots during fourth period gym, can have toys, please remember not to double park in front of the local schools, some of us need to get places.

Also if you so truly believe that I have no power as a human being when your coupon doesn't work, please don't blame it on me, remember I'm just the dumb high schooler. Also if you're going to defend yourself to this (which trust me I know you will), by saying, "Then don't do stupid stuff," the point I'm making for you is we aren't bad people and we're not all criminals.

Did you know that in the state of New York cyberbullying is actually illegal?

Now, for all you out there that aren't bright enough to know what cyberbullying is, here the definition: “The use of electronic communication to bully a person, typically by sending messages of an intimidating or threatening nature.” This is also known as slander for all the false reports and gossip you put out there. Slander is, “the action or crime of making a false spoken statement damaging to a person's reputation.” Slander can also be taken into legal actions. Well, now that your the real one breaking the law, please remember that next time you go and attack a child. We’re sons, daughters, sisters, brothers, students and no matter what you think, we have bright futures.

Future CEO and President of the United States is officially signing off.

XOXO, Gossip Girl