In a perfect world, none of us will have ever experienced depression.

But, that's not reality.

Unfortunately, according to the ADAA (Anxiety and Depression Association in America)

• Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults in the United States age 18 and older, or 18% of the population. (Source: National Institute of Mental Health)
• Anxiety disorders are highly treatable, yet only about one-third of those suffering receive treatment.
• It's not uncommon for someone with an anxiety disorder to also suffer from depression or vice versa. Nearly one-half of those diagnosed with depression are also diagnosed with an anxiety disorder.

There are many forms of anxiety that branch off one another, and depression goes hand in hand with many of these. Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Social Anxiety Disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder are examples of this.

Did you know that women are twice as likely to suffer from almost all of these disorders?

Rape is the most likely trigger of P.T.S.D., affecting 7.7 million people or about 3.5% of the population. Yet, we still can't get it together when it comes to agreeing on a unified healthcare system, one where people affected by these disorders actually get the help they need, instead of self-medicating to numb the pain.

This is a poem I wrote a couple of months back.

I was depressed, and I didn't reach out for help.

That was my mistake, However, I was too proud to admit how depressed and stressed out I was.

Sometimes, we have to learn to ask for help. No matter how proud you may be, or independent you are, no one deserves to suffer through depression or anxiety alone.

My chenille duvet covers me

Consumes me

It has swallowed me up

Again…

and let me escape

To a world where the bills don’t exist

My homework is finished

The dishes are done

The cats are fed

My son goes to school without a fight

My chenille duvet hides my reality

The reality…

that

The bills still aren’t paid

The dishes are still there

The homework keeps piling up

The cats are at the foot of my bed, begging to be fed...again

My son has yet again skipped school and come home, not knowing that i am under my duvet

My chenille duvet allows me to feel no pain

It allows me to forget

Even…

if for a little while

Underneath my chenille duvet, the world is silent

My feet are warm

My mind stops racing

Deep….

Dark….

anxious thoughts

My heart stops beating as if ravaged through my chest

I can breathe

Every day gets a little bit harder to leave my duvet

My old ragged gray soft duvet

I long for you during the day

On the days when I am in class and don’t have my homework to hand in, because I am so tired

On the days I get a call from my sons school asking where he is, when i know i dropped him off

On the days I get home, and the dishes are still there

On the days I get home from a 12 hour day, realizing I forgot to buy cat food again

On the days I come home and cringe going up the stairs as i pray they didn’t turn my electric off again

On the days I told the landlord I would have his rent

But my check didn’t come

Again...

On the days I have to get up, and pretend I am the happiest fucking person

When all I want to do, is break down and cry

And have someone else care…

For once

My gray soft fuzzy duvet, I miss you

Why can’t you console me all the time?

I don’t want you to leave me

I need you to stay and make it all go away