I feel like every Father's Day, I do a worse and worse job at being a good daughter. Last year I wasn't even in the country; let's face it, that's about as bad as it gets. Also, my gift ideas are really stretching thin. Happy Father's Day, here's your 433rd tie! And yes, that's right, another box of that candy you said you liked one time (but are now probably sick of because I buy it for every holiday)! Here's something uber-practical you can only use at work, to remind you that life is not for recreation! (Paperweights, mugs, and stationery all fall into this category.) I mean, I do my best. But there's only so much I can spend, and God help me if I try to make something; my artistic talent stays around the realm of paper airplanes and stick figures.

So this year, I thought I'd write this to remind him how important and impactful his presence in my life has been. This one goes out to all the fathers, father-figures, and men of importance in our lives: these are a few things I'd like to thank you for.

1. Thank you for always, ALWAYS being concerned about my car.

"Did you check your oil?" "When was the last time you got that thing inspected?" "How's the air pressure in your tires?" "You know, every now and then it wouldn't kill you to look under the hood," "What do you mean you can't change a spare tire?!"

I think this is a universal love language for fathers. You know that I don't know a thing about the two-ton machine I am expected to barrel down the highway in at 70 mph, and (understandably), that gives you a heart attack. Thank you for texting and calling me to make sure that my car, and my health, as a result, are well-taken care of. Life gets overwhelming sometimes; it's awfully nice to have someone keep up with some of the little stuff for you. Thank you for loving me despite the panic I put you through.

2. Thank you for giving me so much confidence.

This can be a dangerous thing, my friend. You are extremely biased and you have no problem deluding my sense of reality. According to you, I've been the most beautiful girl at every formal event I've ever attended. I've been the hardest working athlete on the field, I've been on the right side of every argument, I've been blameless in many areas where I probably deserved the blame. You have encouraged me, loved me, and held me in such high regard that I felt ready to take on the world. I cherish your Wednesday afternoon phone call, in which you tell me I'm a brilliant and dedicated student. Your unceasing support and love have made the woman I am today, and she's not perfect, but she's better because of you.

3. Thank you for giving me my sense of humor.

Granted, not everyone appreciates it. It's the kind based mostly on laughing at yourself. It is rooted in annoying your loved ones and then wondering why they don't find you irresistibly charming. It borders on inappropriate and obscure. Actually, now that I'm writing this all down, it's possible that we are the only ones who find our humor, well..humorous.

What does it matter? You've given me the gift of laughter in times I have been at my lowest. You've told me my favorite stories, done my favorite impressions, and danced the "back it up dance" (as you call it) time and time again to bring a smile to my face, and I don't think you truly understand how much it has affected me. I now live my life in search of filling people with the same joy you have given me-I hope to one day be as funny to someone as you are to me.

4. Thank you for showing me tough love.

I can be a very unpleasant person. I've been told by those who love me most that I have a certain "je ne sias quoi" for mockery. You, dad, know this better than anyone, and yet in my life you have consistently been a bearer of truth, even if it means you'll be the bad guy for a little while. You are not afraid to put the thoughts in my head that I don't want to hear, but really need to be heard. You have saved me from my own ego and naivety more times than I care to reminisce about (for I am a prideful woman), and I don't know what path I'd be meandering down had you not realigned my route.

Most of my life, I have been felt absolutely sure of myself. I knew when I was five that I wanted to be a taxi driver. I knew when I was nine that I liked vanilla better than chocolate and pink better than purple, and if I could, I would change my name to "Brittany." I knew at 12 that I wanted a mansion with a room in it for everyone of my 20 dogs. Many of these things have fallen away with the addition of common sense and adulthood, but honestly, they've been replaced with shakiness and hesitance. I am just beginning my adult life, and the decisions I make have a much greater impact on my life. It's no longer pink vs. purple: it becomes which graduate school should I choose? Is 22 too young to get married? What's a good loan interest rate? Through all of these big decisions, you've been to me a north star, and it's brought me a sense of peace in this crazy time of change and adjustment.

5. Thank for the eyes. And the face. And the addiction to sugar.

No matter how much I deny it, I am just like you in so many ways. I can't help but smile when people tell me I have big brown eyes; I reflexively answer "I got them from my dad!" every time. I love that when we go to the store, we both slow waaay down in the candy aisle. You get dark chocolate that tastes like dirt because it makes you feel better about your purchase, and I buy the most colorful, sickening sugar product in the store. You always end up stealing some of mine. I love that when I say "And a side of fries," you give me the side eye because it's not the healthiest food. And then you order the same thing and I give you the side eye right back.

In addition to a sweet tooth and physical features, I have become just like you in my actions and attitude. I love to be busy. I feel most happy when I'm doing a good job or helping someone out. I take little projects very seriously, and if I can't do something perfectly, I don't want to do it. I love that we both stress about thoughts no one else would ever let cross their minds. I love that every time the car in front of me takes too long to pull forward, I yell "There's no planes coming!" because you said that once and I thought it was so funny. We are both stubborn and argumentative, and sometimes that means we end up yelling over our bowls of pasta about whether I watch too much TV (the answer is yes). You, Dr. Frankenstein, have created a monster, and she has your eyes and wants some of your chocolate dirt.

6. Thank you for giving me a sense of family.

Let me be frank: growing up, I did not like visiting with relatives. They were complete strangers to me, they were tall, they were loud, and you insisted I ate everything they made and gave everyone a hug and kiss (author's note- I am Italian). I remember telling my grandpa that I would not eat the cherry pie he made because my mom had never fed me such an exotic dish, and I didn't think my uncultured tiny palate could handle it. My grandpa said "You're eating it!" and everyone watched as I was forced to chew and swallow this red, gooey delicacy. I told my mom on grandpa that night, insisting that his home was not a place intended to return. But every Sunday, there I sat in the back of your Volvo 940 Wagon (the kind with the seats that faced the back windshield), being dragged to Fea Lane to spend time with these frightening people.

The point of this story is that you never let me out of that tradition. I was there for every cousin's birthday, every christening, every first communion...and I am inordinately thankful for all of those dreaded days. Fea Lane is now my favorite place in the whole world, filled with people that I love more than anything- the kind of love that can only come from having people in your life who were also in your very first memories. You taught me that grandpa is full of wisdom and wisecracks. That Aunt Laura's love language is keeping her house orderly and taking your shoes off before entering the house. That there is a direct proportion between wine drunk and the probability that you'll be asked to play an instrument or put on a performance for everyone. And, most importantly, you taught me to appreciate that room full of people, once strangers, who have come together with the sole purpose of being a part of each other's lives. Thank you.

7. Thank you for your constancy.

You, and Sundays at grandma's, and church at Holy Spirit, and taco nights (remember taco nights??) have been ever-present in my life. I know before 4pm is an ideal time to call if I want to leave a voicemail, because you're still at work. I know that your go-to dinner for us is mashed potatoes, chicken, and broccoli. I know that if I look into your cabinets I'll find that red Campbell's mug and those two super-fancy wine glasses we never use. I know that you need your glasses to see things on my phone. That when you call me and ask how I am, if I answer "Tired.", you'll start to worry and give me advice on eating and sleeping. I know that if anything even semi-sentimental is happening (in a movie, on a TV episode, listening to a particularly reminiscent song, watching a baptism at church) you are tearing up. It is yet another quality I've inherited from you, and it is one I really don't mind having. You have always given me routine, ritual, and steadiness in a life that can be pretty overwhelming sometimes.

So, daddy, this one goes out to you. You are the coolest guy I know. I am overjoyed to be your offspring. Thank you. To every man who has stepped up to be this role in someone's life. Just...thank you. Happy Father's Day you guys.